Total pages in book: 61
Estimated words: 60342 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 241(@250wpm)___ 201(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60342 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 241(@250wpm)___ 201(@300wpm)
“This isn’t playing fair,” he says.
“Life isn’t fair.”
“I was doing the right thing. I wanted to make sure you weren’t doing something you’d regret.”
I level my gaze at him. “Do you want to know what I think it was?”
“I just told you what it was.”
“Hmm ... I don’t think so.” I lick my bottom lip. “I think you were making sure you weren’t doing something you’d regret.”
His eyes blaze.
“Called you out with that one, huh?” I ask. “I don’t want to take anything away from you, so I’ll admit that you were being a gentleman and giving me space to process the past few days. And from the bottom of my heart, I appreciate that. Thank you.”
He shifts his weight.
“But I also think you have the same thoughts going through your head that I do,” I say. “And you’re afraid if we connect like this, if we have sex, that it’ll hurt just as much as it did back then when we part.”
“What’s your solution to that?”
I smile at him. “I don’t have one. But I’ve made some big, risky decisions lately. They haven’t killed me yet. I might as well make one more. At least this time it won’t hurt when you don’t come for me. I’ll already expect it.”
“What are you talking about?” His face grows sober in a flash. “What do you mean when I don’t come for you?”
“I really thought you’d come and see me. You said you would. But it doesn’t matter now. We survived, and now we’re here. We’ve had a lot of life experiences since then. I think we can decide whether to hook up or not.”
“I have one problem with that.”
“Now?”
He grins. “Yes, now.”
“What? Hurry up. You still have to order the pizza.”
“I think the pizza got put on the back burner.” He blows out a breath. “Look, if we take things any further, it won’t be a hookup for me.”
My stomach drops to the floor.
“You have to know that going into it,” he says, watching me closely. “I’m not saying … I don’t know what I’m saying, Laina. I understand how different our lives are and how each is important to us. But I can’t just be exiled from your life again. I want you—I’ve always wanted you. Not a day has passed that I haven’t wanted any part of you that you’d give me.”
I struggle to catch a steady breath. My heart races as I wrap my head around what he’s saying. He’s … always wanted me? But he didn’t find me. He let me go when I left. Luke didn’t pursue me, so why is he saying this?
“I’ve never exiled you from my life, Luke. I don’t know why you’re saying that.”
His eyes narrow as he closes the gap between us.
“This is your call. You can stay here either way. Regardless of what happens in the next few minutes, I’ll always be there for you.” He swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. “But if you really want to take this beyond a friendship, if only for this one night, it will change things for me. I’m not going to pretend it won’t.”
His confession makes my head spin. There is so much to unpack. Why does he think I exiled him? And is he telling me he believes we should try again?
Do I want that?
A million thoughts race through my mind at record speed. People will vilify me—they’ll downright crucify me if anyone finds out that I slept with Luke this close to my runaway bride act. They’ll think I’ve been cheating on Tom with Luke. The headlines will smear me and say that I led Tom on, and this is payback for what happened in Paris. That’s how their small minds work. Because the press doesn’t know about Luke. Somehow.
But my father knows about Luke.
He knows about Luke and will actually lose his brain if he hears that we’ve rekindled a relationship. I’m unsure if it will impact my brand deals or sponsorships. Will my public relations team give up on me if I do this?
Those thoughts weigh heavily on my mind as I stand before Luke. But as I look up into his handsome face, those beautiful, kind eyes, and into a soul I feel as connected to now as I ever have … I don’t care.
I just don’t care.
Let them talk. They’re going to anyway.
I’ve made so many decisions to make everyone else happy. This—Luke—will make me happy.
“Here’s the thing,” I say, running my hands across his chest. “I don’t think what we have is just a friendship. I don’t think it’s ever been just that.”
His breaths are shaky.
“And I’ve had many life experiences since I left this town, but none of them feel the way I feel when I’m with you,” I say, smiling up at him. “I don’t know what this looks like or how it would work. If it can work. But I am one thousand percent sure I won’t wake up in the morning and regret this. I’ll only regret it if we don’t.”