Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 95173 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 476(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95173 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 476(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
“Vivi,” she says softly, and I laugh bitterly.
“Oh, wait, it gets so much better,” I say. “She was walking ahead of him. They had just got out of his car, and then she turned to him with a huge smile on her face, and I saw.” I take a huge inhale. “She was pregnant.”
“Oh my God,” she whispers, putting her hand to her mouth.
“Yup.” I nod. “Imagine that. He was supposed to be leaving her, and she’s now pregnant. Two years after he told me he was leaving. Two fucking years I wasted in love with him.”
“You believed him.” She tries to make it sound better.
“I was so stupid,” I tell her, the tears coming now, but they aren’t for Scott. They are for Mark. “I swore I would never be that vulnerable again. I saw you fall in love, and I knew it would never happen for me.”
“But …” she says, and I shake my head.
“But nothing, Karrie. I won’t ever let myself hurt like that again,” I say. “Ever. It went on too long, and I know this. I should have stopped it.”
“You l—”
I put out my hand. “I liked him, and now it’s over,” I tell her, and then I look at her. “Will you help me change my sheets?” I look down.
“I’ll change the sheets. You just sit there.” She gets up and leaves the room by herself.
“I shouldn’t have gone back for round two,” I tell myself, rubbing my hands over my face, but it smells like him. His smell is still all over me, and when I look down, I see I’m wearing his shirt. “I shouldn’t have gone back.” I lean over and lie down on the couch, then close my eyes, and all I can do is see him. Smiling at me, leaning in and kissing me, hugging me, over me. The memories replaying over and over again.
I feel the blanket on my legs, and I open my eyes to see Karrie sit by me with her own blanket. “I need to get rid of that bed,” I tell her. “And this couch.” Then I close my eyes. “My shower, the table. The kitchen.”
“I think it’s easier if you just move,” she says, then looks at me. “Was it where I’m sitting?”
“Probably,” I answer her, and she closes her eyes. “Please, like I haven’t sat on your couch before.”
“This is true,” she says.
“I might have to replace that window also.” I point at the window.
“The window?” she asks me.
“Well, I was looking outside, and he came up behind me,” I tell her.
“And his dick fell into you?” she asks.
“I may have bent over.” I roll onto my back. “I need to move. This is why I don’t bring it home.”
“He isn’t just a one-night stand,” she tells me.
“Merde.” Shit, I say in French. “Merde, merde, merde.”
“It’ll be okay,” she says, and she lays by me the whole night. When the morning comes, I feel as if I’m suffering from a hangover or a truck running me over. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this bad before.
“I really hope I’m not coming down with something,” I tell her, sitting in joggers and a shirt that is not Mark’s with my hair piled on my head. “My bones ache.”
“It’s called heartbreak,” she tells me, sipping her own coffee.
“Yeah, that’s what I was afraid of,” I say into my own cup. “I can’t go to the game tonight.”
“I know,” she says, and she doesn’t push me. She doesn’t tell me that I have no choice; she just accepts it.
“I hope he’s okay,” I whisper and look over at her.
“Me, too,” she says. “Me, too.”
I turn to look out the window, and I wonder where he is right now. I wonder if he’s sitting on his terrace looking at the water or if he’s just lying on the couch like me.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Mark
“There he is.” I hear my mother’s voice when I walk into my apartment door. She comes to me with her arms open. “My baby boy,” she says, and I bend down to hug her. Her brown hair curled as always. I hug her like I always do, and she presses her cheek to my chest.
“You know he’s in his thirties,” my brother says from behind her. My eyes fly to him, and I smile at him. It’s been one week since the huge blowup at Vivienne’s house. One week since I’ve seen her, spoken to her, felt her, hugged her, or kissed her. It’s been a week since I’ve been able to breathe.
My mother’s hands still around my waist while she tells my brother. “Shush and stop being jealous.” I smirk at him as she shuts him up, and that smirk lasts for maybe a second before the next part comes out of her. “You look skinny,” my mother says, and I roll my eyes.