This Christmas Read Online Heidi McLaughlin

Categories Genre: Alpha Male Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 50080 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
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No, no, no.

I look “I don’t want to leave my dad, Caryn. He’s the whole reason we came to town.”

“But I’m bored and there’s nothing to do here.”

“You knew this before you even agreed to come.”

“Yes, and now I’ve been here, I want to leave.”

I take a deep breath and take her hand in mine. “I love you, babe. You go to Albany, do whatever with Serena. But please be back on Friday. My dad is getting this huge honor, and I’d really like for you to be there.”

Caryn pouts for the briefest of seconds. “Okay, love you.” She says and then she’s out the door without even a kiss goodbye.

I stand there until my dad’s voice sounds. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” I say with a hint of a sigh. “Just thought I could mix my current life with my old one.”

“Not going so well?”

“Not even close.”

ELEVEN

EVANGELINE

It has been a few days since I’ve seen Zane. Honestly, the reprieve has been sort of nice. I know he’s around town because Noelle has told me she’s run into him at the Evergreen Café and even at Alma’s Bakery in the morning getting breakfast. Noelle has also informed me that Caryn has not been around, and it makes me wonder why. Did she leave? Is Zane about to leave his dad brokenhearted again? Mr. Whitaker is really the only person who matters in this equation. Although, I have to admit that once Zane ends up leaving, I’ll be sad and wish things could have been different between us, but those days are long gone. He’s moved on and I’m determined to do the same right after the beginning of the year. There is no point in trying to look for romance in December since I am so busy.

At least that’s what I'm telling myself.

Losing Zane was one of the hardest things I’ve ever been through. There was a time, right after I accepted that he wasn’t coming back, when I thought I was having a heart attack. I’d never felt suffocated in my life until those moments. The hyperventilating cries were enough to scare my friends into calling for an ambulance. Most days my chest hurt. I would walk around in pain. It was as if someone had stabbed me in the heart.

Someone had.

My grades suffered. All my hard work circled down the drain. Slowly, I pulled myself out of the funk. While I didn’t cry at the drop of a hat, when I was alone at night, I did. My life as I knew it would never be the same.

It’s because of what I went through, that I’ve kept myself closed off from others. Sure, there are eligible men in town. Some would make fantastic partners. Men from the surrounding towns have shown interest. But I’m afraid. What I went through with Zane isn’t something I’m going to forget. In this case, time doesn’t heal all wounds. And now that he’s here, they’re opening again.

I know it’s not fair to compare other men to Zane. For what it’s worth, he’s apologized. He spoke his truth, and I believe he feels bad about everything. I’m just not going to let my guard down.

You mean work really hard to keep it up.

Earlier in the week, the crew from the farm brought the town’s Christmas tree to the town center. A couple of years ago, my dad had our employees rebuild the gazebo because it was falling apart. Ever since, there have been some couples who have had their wedding ceremonies there. One time, I drove by during a ceremony, and the set up was beautiful.

Personally, if I ever get married, it’ll be in Old First Church, and of course I want a December wedding. There is just something about a wintery Christmas wedding with roses, chrysanthemums, and hypericum berries in a mixture of white and red, that conveys magic.

Of course, Santa would have to officiate.

Now, my dad and I stand at the Christmas tree and, as promised, I plug the lights in so we can make sure they work. Dad tests the button, which is really a lever pushed into the main power strip power button. We repeat the process multiple times before we call it good.

“Have you confirmed with Bernie?” My dad asks as we work to clean up the space.

“Not since I saw him on Monday. Why? What’s up?”

“Nothing. I’m making sure. You mentioned he wasn’t fully on board.”

“I think he’s nervous. He doesn’t like crowds and with Zane home . . .” I trail off, not sure where I was going with that.

“We should probably talk about Christmas dinner,” Dad says.

“What about it?” I hold out my arms, and he wraps the extension cord around them.

“Bernie always comes over. I imagine Zane will be with him.”

“And Caryn.”

Dad nods.

“It’s fine. I’ll be fine,” I tell him. “Caryn’s very nice. I think you’ll like her.”


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