Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 84194 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84194 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
He shrugged. “The second time…I knew it was over for me. Twice, I put Jealousy in your place, transforming her into you, letting men believe they fucked you, when in reality, I would’ve torn their fucking heads from their corpses if they ever touched you.
“I was late to the illusion as Roy Slater...leaving you on that doorstep drowning in need. And when I opened the door to you in that cute restaurant outfit? Fuck me, I choked on a confession there and then. I wanted to tell you everything. To stop playing the charade of having a son and pretending you were untouchable. Of having the luxury of telling you I was in love with you and not hide behind a fucking guest. Christ…sleeping with you in that fantasy, I walked a tightrope the entire time. A few times, I worried I’d broken the illusion—that you knew exactly who filled you, that it was me admitting all my fuck-ups.”
Rising onto his knees, he came closer, cupping my cheeks again. “You’re right that it’s different when we touch. That bite between us, that painful kick of awareness has never happened with anyone before. When I touch you, I feel it. It hurts my heart and turns me hard. And no matter the tricks I employ or the code I use to blind…that chemistry can never be hidden.”
Smiling sadly, he added, “Oh, and the diamond was from me. I pretended it was from Grammer because how the hell was I supposed to admit that I’d fallen for you so quickly? I was jealous of myself. Jealous of the memory of being with you. Jealous of the freedom we’d found together. Jealous that I couldn’t have you in reality.”
Tears glossed my vision, making him dance and blur.
“Don’t cry.” He tutted under his breath, wiping the droplets away with a thumb. “Please, don’t cry.”
Pressing his forehead to mine, he swallowed hard, and murmured, “I created Euphoria from a dream. I had computer hackers and tech gurus transform a hare-brained idea into something that traded mundane into magic. I’d never used it until you. I’d never wanted to be tricked into feeling something I couldn’t afford to feel. But…I fell for you in the same way. I dreamed about you, Jinx. I dreamed of a brown-haired goddess with silver stunning eyes, and I fell in love with a figment of my imagination.”
He chuckled with awe, pulling away to look at me. “Imagine my surprise when you turned out better than my fantasy. When you overshadowed my dream girl. When you made me realise how much I fucking love you.”
Taking my hands, he slowly pulled at the sticky sensors on my fingertips. Deep in the illusion, I couldn’t see anything existed on my hands. I couldn’t feel the sticky sensors. I couldn’t pull them off on my own. But as Sully systemically removed them, I gasped as they appeared in his touch. The oddness of him peeling something I couldn’t see off my own body and then witnessing them appear out of thin air made the power of his creation even more dangerous.
What he’d created with Euphoria could be used for the greatest pleasure and for the worst kind of nightmare. What if his program fell into the wrong hands? What if it was used for torture instead of orgasms?
The poor person trapped inside it would have their mind scrambled until it trickled out of their ears, mentally broken forever.
Sully halted my fear, placing my sensor-free fingertips on his chest.
I instantly moaned at the contact.
Not because our skin once again ignited with fire, but because I touched Sully, not a blond stable boy. I ran my hands over hair and muscle. I felt power and heat and a body I recognised over the one I’d never seen before. It was so strange to touch a smaller man yet feel a larger chest. To trust what my fingers told me, rather than my eyes.
He shuddered as I dropped my hands lower, tracing the hard ridges of his belly, teasing the soft flesh above his belt.
His voice thickened with harsher gravel as he continued, “The illusion tonight…the guest you think wore my body?” He waited until I looked up, needing me to concentrate and not ruin both of us with need. “There was no guest, Eleanor.”
I frowned, my fingers stopping their exploration. “But how—”
“It was a computer program.” He bent and kissed me, licking my lower lip once before murmuring, “Do you honestly think I’d be able to let some man touch you now, when I wasn’t even capable of that at the beginning?”
I shivered. “I don’t understand.”
“While learning how to write the cypher for fantasies, I wrote a code for myself. I copied my attributes and uploaded an avatar into the system. I’ve never used it…until now. It can be run without a host. I just type dialogue…and allow the program to interact with you.”