Total pages in book: 139
Estimated words: 127146 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 636(@200wpm)___ 509(@250wpm)___ 424(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 127146 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 636(@200wpm)___ 509(@250wpm)___ 424(@300wpm)
He makes me feel more than I’ve ever felt, and somehow, I can’t make him see the destruction he’s causing, what he’s doing to me when I’m already so fragile. He can never build me back up in the way I need. He only knows how to destroy, and I can only take so much heartbreak before I shatter.
CHAPTER 29
DREW
You can only run so far from your circumstances. And my fucking circumstances have my balls in a vise that’s threatening to pop them.
I walk quickly across the campus, needing the burn of the air to calm me down. To stifle the urge to turn around, go back to her, and fuck this need out of me. Until the itch for her stops. Fuck her until I no longer crave the taste of her skin against my lips.
It's an infatuation because my father wants her out of my life. All he's done is make her more desirable by making her off-limits.
A few students are running around the campus to different buildings, thankfully all giving me a wide berth. If any of them so much as look my way, I might explode and goddamn kill someone.
Anything to gain control of my life, for fuck’s sake. That's all I want. Control. The ability to make my own choices, to make my own moves for what I want. Instead of what my father wants all the time. What the team wants, what my teachers want. All of it.
My life is always about what someone else wants. That might be why I don't go easy on my wallflower...she's the only thing I feel I have control of in my life. Fucked up for sure, but I don't care.
That's gotta be why I can still taste her and why all I can think about is having her again. She makes me feel like I’m in control for the very short time I get with her. But now, everything has changed. As much as I say she’s mine, she’s right. I want her fighting, spitting, cursing. I want her to fight back because it makes my control of her all the sweeter.
I jog up the steps of The Mill and touch the wood of the door. Home. At least my father isn't living here too. Inside, I get a moment of peace. If my friends aren't being dicks that is.
When I open the door, it's to Sebastian pacing back and forth across the foyer, kicking football padding out of the way with every pass.
He's wearing a button-down shirt and slacks like he just got back from a damn job interview. I stop short and close the door softly to avoid interrupting the conversation. He snaps out a word in French, and I catch a few curse words in the next guttural angry phrase.
He spins to make another pass across the entryway and glances up to meet my eyes. Another curse, and he cuts off the call and squeezes his phone in his hand. “What are you looking at?" he demands, locking eyes with me. There's real fury on his face, in the set of his jaw, the tense line of his neck.
"I don't know. What am I looking at?" I set my feet and cross my arms. I’m so close to the edge of something. Bel kicking me out, telling me things are done, has me primed for a fight, and it looks like Sebastian might need to take the edge off too.
We stare each other down, neither willing to put up with each other's shit.
He stalks forward until only a foot is between us. "What are you doing, man? You and that fucking girl?"
I tense, then clear my face to neutral. "What fucking girl?"
He opens his mouth, and I close the distance, going chest to chest with him. "Don't you dare say her name."
"You're going to choose some, some groupie, over us? Your friends, your team?"
He’s close enough I can smell the whiskey on his breath.
"I don't have to make a choice. There's no need, so what the fuck is the problem here? Who was on the phone, and why do you feel the need to confront me about her at least once a week? She's my tutor, for the moment, and that's fucking it. Actually, no, I take that back. I’m already done with her. You and my father have gotten your way. She’s nothing to me, really, nothing."
"Oh really? Is that why you smell like sweat and sex right now?"
"Get your head out of my ass, and you wouldn't need to worry about it, would you?"
There's a soft footstep on the stairs, and then a pause.
I glance over Sebastian's shoulder to find Lee, frozen, his hands on the rails. "Uh...what's going on, guys?"
I point and step back so I can keep them both in sight. "You want to weigh in too? The only person not riding my ass about Bel is fucking Aries. Maybe he's the only one who knows better!"