Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 91504 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 458(@200wpm)___ 366(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91504 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 458(@200wpm)___ 366(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
* * *
The next afternoon, I had an hour break between patients, so I went out to get some fresh air and pick up lunch.
“They didn’t have rye bread.” I fished my assistant Sarah’s sandwich out of the brown paper bag and set it on her desk. “So I got you multigrain instead.”
“Thanks.” She smiled and motioned toward my office door. “You have someone waiting for you.”
“Mrs. Trenka is this early?”
“Nope. A certain hot hockey player is waiting.” She picked up her earbuds and pushed one into her ear with a wink. “I’ll be listening to music while I eat. Very loudly. So I won’t hear a thing.”
Good, then you won’t hear us arguing. Connor and I hadn’t spoken since last night, when he’d come home drunk and belligerent, still upset about the birth control. He’d been passed out on the couch when I left for work this morning.
The smell of fresh flowers hit me as soon as I opened my office door. But the visual was the real gut punch. Connor was sitting at my desk, his hands wrapped around the largest bouquet of hydrangeas I’d ever seen. He stood, and my heart squeezed. My beautiful man looked beautifully broken, sadness and pain etched into deep lines that hadn’t been there only a few months ago.
We’d both said hurtful things last night, but none of that was important at the moment. I went to him, cupping his cheeks in my hands and wanting to do anything to take away his pain. Tears welled in my eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too.”
“I should’ve never made the decision to go back on the pill without discussing it with you.”
He shook his head. “You were right to do it. I’m not in any condition to be a father. I’m a fucking mess, Mer.”
“No, you’re not. You just need to believe in yourself. I know in my heart you’re going to get back on the ice, but even if you don’t, we’ll figure it out. Together.”
Connor looked down for a long time. When he met my eyes again, he swallowed. “You were right. The painkillers were making things worse. I didn’t stop taking them when I said I did a few weeks ago. But I’m done now. I had a few left, and I dumped them down the sink this morning. I’m also going to ease up on the drinking.”
Tears streamed down my face. “You’re getting stronger every day. You need to believe in yourself, Connor. You can do this. I know you can.”
He nodded. “We can do this. We’ll do it together.”
Relief flooded me as I threw my arms around his neck, hugging him as tightly as I could. We stayed that way for a long time. After we finally let go, we shared my lunch and enjoyed each other’s company for the first time in what felt like forever. He left only because my next patient arrived.
The rest of the afternoon, everything seemed a little lighter, a little brighter. After two months of dreading going home, I was actually looking forward to finishing up and seeing my husband after my last patient of the day left.
“Anything we need to talk about?” I pulled on my coat and spoke to Sarah in the waiting room.
She smiled. “Someone is in a rush tonight.”
“Connor is making me dinner.”
“Enjoy. I’m just going to finish up this letter to an insurance company and then I’m right behind you.”
“Good. Enjoy your night, Sarah.”
“Oh, wait. Did you leave the prescription for Mr. Mankin? He’s going down to Florida to take care of his mom for a month because she’s having some surgery. He needs a paper script to fill down there when he runs out in a few weeks. Dumb insurance won’t let him fill it this early. Not sure if you saw my note in your messages. He called earlier to say he would pick it up first thing tomorrow.”
“Shoot. Yes, I did see the note. But I totally forgot. Thanks for the reminder. Let me write it now in case he comes in before I get here.” I set my purse on Sarah’s desk and went back into my office to grab my prescription pad. But when I opened my top right drawer, the place where I always kept it, it wasn’t there. I pushed around some papers. Not finding it, I checked the other drawers.
“Sarah?” I yelled. “Have you seen my prescription pad?”
“Last time I saw it, it was in the top right drawer.”
I pulled it out farther this time and rummaged through again. No luck.
Sarah walked into my office. “Did you find it?”
“No.”
“Maybe you used the last one?”
An ominous feeling washed over me as I remembered my husband sitting within arm’s reach just hours earlier. “Umm… Yeah, that must be it.”
CHAPTER 9 Now
The second day of the new year. Happy New Year! signs replace the glittering glow of Christmas lights and menorahs in windows. I pass a gym whose windows proclaim New Year, New You!