Total pages in book: 118
Estimated words: 109178 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 546(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 364(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 109178 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 546(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 364(@300wpm)
“Maybe being better is being truthful about who you are, too.”
Their eyes locked. His body warmed and his muscles tensed.
“I know who I am.”
“You do, your self-awareness is admirable, but you don’t look deeper into the darker pieces of you, Len. You are so busy tryna run from your past, you ain’t slowed down enough to really see it for what it was.”
“What I did back then, Nadia, was out of character. Up until that point, I had been a good kid.”
“I know that you chalk it up as you mournin’ your mama and actin’ out. That might be true, but everything we do is in character, Len, or we wouldn’t have done it in the first fucking place.” She took his hands in hers and rubbed them, the most peaceful smile on her face, and yet he was filled with so much unease.
“Regardless, none of those things I did will happen again, Nadia. I’ve come too far and I have too much to lose.”
“Fair enough… So, what are you going to do about this little grandpa problem of yours?” She released him and leaned back against the couch.
“I have a plan, just need to get the details down pat. Can’t go in half-cocked.”
“Tell me what your plan is, ’cause maybe I can help you.”
“The less you know, the better. I don’t want you embroiled in this bullshit.”
“I can handle myself just fine. I’ve entertained big time drug dealers and gang bangers… been in a room full of hate-filled horny men with guns, when fights have broken out. Bullets flyin’. Ain’t met a mothafucka that can spook me yet.”
He leaned forward and caressed the side of her face with a gentle hand. She had the heart of a lion, the beauty of a butterfly, and the compassion of a lamb. She was his sword, his sunshine, and his rock.
He glanced at his watch, then cleared his throat. Time to address another situation that couldn’t wait a second longer.
“Not to get off topic, but uh, is there anything you wanna tell me, Nadia?”
She looked at him curiously. “About this letter?” She pointed to the coffee table.
“No, about your life. About anything you got goin’ on right now.”
“Huh?” she shrugged, then took a draw from e-Cig before turning it off. “I’ve been an open book.”
He grimaced and crossed his arms.
“Let me move back before lightning strikes.”
“Okay, not right away,” she chuckled, “but lately I have. I don’t know what you’re getting at. Just spit it out.”
He pointed to the table. “I showed you that letter so you’d understand that I’ve got a serious situation I’m dealin’ with right now. It was only fair. I can’t be in a relationship with you without you knowin’ that my grandfather is this kind of person. He’s a dangerous man, one of the most known and feared in Houston. He’s got half the damn police paid off to stay outta his business, and he’s never hesitated on blowin’ someone’s brains out if he felt threatened. For most of my life, I have dealt with this stigma. This black cloud.
“That is why I didn’t talk to people at work, and still don’t, about my family, especially him. I’ve been workin’ a long time because I had to make my own money since I kept refusing to join him in his nefarious and often illegal activities. I can’t hitch myself to him. He’ll then own me. My father is one of his many lapdogs. It’s pathetic.” His throat burned as his pancakes repeated in his system. “I don’t ever wanna end up like my old man. So, with all of that, I had to tell you about this. Because I love you, and I’m serious about us being together. He doesn’t have a history of messin’ with folks’ girlfriends and wives, but it still wouldn’t be fair to keep that from you.”
She nodded in agreement.
“He doesn’t have a history for it unless they’re dead.” She pointed to the letter. “Threatening to tell your deceased mama’s family about her little stint in sexual services and ruining her family’s reputation and lives in the process is nasty work.”
“Yeah.” He sighed. “True, but you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean, baby. Look. Thank you for tellin’ me, but it doesn’t change anything about me. You. Us. You’ve made your decision to stay the hell away from this family business, and I stand beside you every step of the way. I support your decision. Instead of being retired and quieting down, your grandfather seems to be just getting started. Old and evil is a hell of a combination. He don’t know how to love, but he sho’ know how to hate. He does it well. Angels need to be cultivated. Demons never need even one day of trainin’. Funny how bad shit comes to folks so naturally, but being good ’nd righteous we got to work at. Anyway, It’s a lot on yo’ mind right now, and a lot on your table, even without the stress of this mess.”