Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 96833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 484(@200wpm)___ 387(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 484(@200wpm)___ 387(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
“Really?”
I nodded. “But she flaked on me at the last minute, so the trip got canceled. If I hadn’t been at my house, I would’ve never bonded with the Alexanders the way I did. They might’ve found someone else. And I never would’ve met you. I can’t believe how close I came to never knowing you, never having this experience.”
“I can’t believe how close I came to fucking it all up with my attitude.”
I brushed his hair off his forehead. “If you weren’t so damn handsome and intriguing, you might’ve.”
“Every second of every day matters. Every single choice.” He thought for a moment. “When I met Britney at that airport, she’d literally bumped into me. One bump. That was all it took. We were on the same flight, but if I’d just gone to the bathroom and somehow not knocked into her, I might’ve never started arguing with her, might never have met her. And how strange is it now to think that one bump also brought me to you. A matter of seconds could’ve changed my entire life as I know it.”
I searched for his hand and placed it on my stomach. “That bump brought you this bump.”
He smiled. “It did.”
“You’re gonna do great, Sig.”
His eyes narrowed. “What are you talking about?”
“Raising this little human. You’ll be an amazing father.”
“You know something I don’t?”
“I guess in my heart, I do.”
“Well, that’s news to me, love.”
“You’re the most protective person I know. You won’t let anything happen to him or her.”
“I’m much more comfortable with this baby safe inside of you.” He rubbed the skin along my hip. “In fact, I’d love to freeze this moment in time: the baby safely protected and you here with me.”
I curled into him, and we lay in silence for a while.
“What if I can’t do it?” he asked.
I looked up into his eyes. “Take care of the baby alone?”
He shook his head. “Live without you.”
A chill ran down my spine. “You’ll know where to find me if you can’t.”
He examined my face. “So you’re saying even if you go back, the invitation is open to come and steal you away?”
“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to say no to you, Sigmund Benedictus.”
“So, let’s say I find out from Phil and Kate that you’ve met someone. You’re engaged. Getting married.” He sucked in a breath. “God, just thinking about it, I want to murder him—whoever he is.”
I smiled as I threaded my fingers through his hair.
“You’d be open to me showing up on your wedding night, asking you to cavort with me in your father’s shed, burying my head between your legs, and ruining everything for you?”
“If you must…”
“No.” He shook his head. “It doesn’t feel right—thinking of you with anyone else. Just talking about it makes me vengeful. You’re still the only woman who’s ever made me feel this kind of jealousy.” He cleared his throat. “Alright. I’ll stop. I’m not making this easy.” He ground his teeth. “You told me tonight you’re leaving. I’ll find a way to accept it, if that’s what you want.”
But the look of sadness in his eyes made me unsure of my decision.
CHAPTER 47
* * *
Sig
Track 47: “Pray” by Sam Smith
Over the next couple weeks, I made some necessary changes to maximize my time with Abby during the last weeks of her pregnancy, the biggest of which was working remotely until she delivered.
Abby hadn’t returned to her position at Covington. We’d had to fill her post when she’d left for Rhode Island to take care of her father. And with her being at the inn every day, I decided I should be, too.
If there was an emergency, I could always head into London, but I wasn’t going to waste these precious days staring at my office wall when I could’ve been back at the inn staring at her, when I wasn’t on my computer. I shut it down at exactly 5 PM each night and insisted that Abby go for walks with me, since her doctor said light exercise would be good for her circulation.
These days were absolutely my favorite of the entire experience, even if still laced with uncertainty. Every bittersweet moment spent with her felt like a gift:
Early breakfasts together before I had to log in for work.
The way she’d curl up next to me during my conference calls.
Lying next to her every night.
My favorite time was the period after dinner before bedtime. I’d rub Abby’s feet while she and Lavinia put something stupid on the telly. Abby would look at the telly, and I’d look at her. And when she caught me now, I didn’t even try to deny it like I used to.
I’d fallen more in love with her each day but hadn’t repeated the sentiment aloud since that day at Felicity’s. I didn’t want to make things worse when she’d made her decision to leave. The need to tell her I loved her felt constant, though. I needed to convey it in a way that didn’t seem like I was putting pressure on her, trying to sway her into doing something she might never be ready for. But my feelings had only grown since the first time I’d said those words. And she needed to know that.