Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
“Yes, I did,” he says, and there’s a sliver of pride in his tone that triggers a fresh rush of anger.
“Sure, Dad, pat yourself on the back there.”
“Tate.” He looks hurt.
“So you came clean, big deal. It doesn’t change the fact that you slept with somebody else.”
“We were struggling with the new business. We were low on money. My ego was in the gutter.”
“All I’m hearing is more excuses.”
“No, you’re hearing the truth. And like your mother said, it’s context. People aren’t black-and-white creatures. Sure, we know what right and wrong ought to be. But sometimes the line between those is a bit gray. Life clouds your judgment and you cross lines you never thought you’d cross. People do stupid things. I did a stupid thing, and for eleven years I’ve woken up every single day with the intention of showing your mother that I recognize the pain and suffering I caused her, and that I consider each day she continues to stay with me the greatest gift of my life.”
At the table, I notice Mom’s eyes welling up with tears.
I don’t know how I feel about this. To me, cheating is unforgivable. I don’t know how she forgave him. But she must have, because I haven’t picked up on any bitterness or resentment in our home since then. No closed-door arguments. No hostility. As far as I know, they’re open with each other. They seem as in love today as they have been my entire life.
“I don’t expect you to understand.” Dad shrugs. “And I’m not asking for your forgiveness.”
I laugh harshly. “Gee, thanks.”
“The person I hurt already forgave me,” he says simply.
I scoff at him. “You don’t think you hurt me?”
“Has your life been different this past decade?” he asks. “Have we loved you less? Have I treated you worse?”
“No, but …” I’m mad again, because … yes, he’s been a good father. No, it didn’t affect me then. But it’s affecting me now, goddamn it. A growl escapes my throat. “You fucked my girlfriend’s mom.”
Dad flinches.
Mom goes pale.
“So, please, don’t sit there and act like that’s cool. I don’t care if Mom didn’t want to know the name of your mistress. You should’ve said something the moment I started dating Cassie—”
“I didn’t even know she was Victoria’s daughter. I had no idea!”
That gives me pause. When I think on it, I realize he might be telling the truth. I told them Cassie was a neighbor, but I didn’t specifically say which house. I don’t think I even mentioned her last name … I shake myself out of it. Fuck that. I’m not getting hung up on minor details.
“You’ve spent my whole life harping about family,” I mutter. “Family is the most important thing, Tate. Team family! And then you almost blow up our family. And she was right about how hard you try to present yourself as this good guy. Some selfless, perfect saint. But you were selfish when you cheated, and you’re selfish when you go on about the dealership and how you built it for me—”
“Tate—” he tries to interject, looking alarmed.
“Because it’s not about me. It’s about your selfish needs. You want me at the dealership so you have someone to look at boat pictures with. You want to have someone there so you can take Mom on vacation. It’s not about me.” I slam my cup down. Liquid sloshes over the rim and splashes the cedar island.
Mom stands up. “Tate,” she says sharply. “I understand that this is a big shock for you, but we’re still your parents. You can’t speak to your father like that.”
I just stare at her. Then I snort and stalk out the back door.
I don’t know where the hell I’m going. I’m barefoot, clad in plaid pajama pants and an old yacht club T-shirt. I just round the side of the house and walk down the street. This street on which I’ve lived since I was twelve. The town I fell in love with the moment we got here. My first day of school, I met the twins, Wyatt, Chase. I met Steph and Heidi and Genevieve, and immediately had this big friend group. I was swept away, so caught up in this new awesome life of mine that I wasn’t paying attention to my parents’ lives. I was vaguely aware of “the rough patch” and then it passed, and I never even stopped to consider what it meant.
And now I’m stalking down the street on bare feet, trying to figure out why I’m so angry, and that’s when it hits me.
I’m mad because he’s fallen off the pedestal. Not that I intentionally placed him on one, but I had always looked up to my dad. I admired him. I never wanted to let him down. He was the strongest, kindest person I knew. He could do no wrong, and now here I am, discovering that at the end of the day, he’s perfectly capable of being a selfish prick.