Series: Peach State Stepbros Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 92311 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 369(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92311 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 369(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
I grapple with the memories this brings up, but I push through because it’s nice to share them. Not just with anyone, but with Atlas. “It was a slow disappearing act. He’d be gone for weeks. Then months. I thought I’d experienced the worst pain I could experience when Dad left, but when Brandon left, I knew I was wrong. It was so horrible, I thought I was going to die.”
There’s a shift in his gaze, a different sort of concern. “Like, you were going to hurt yourself?”
“No, no. Like my heart was going to explode… I didn’t know how a person could be in so much pain and keep on living. I figured a body would have to shut down before it got that bad, but it doesn’t.” I can’t disguise the despair as the memory comes flooding back, along with the haunting sensation of oppressive, suffocating grief.
When I finally force myself to look at him again, his gaze is tilted down, and I know Atlas well enough to understand he’s working through everything we said today.
“I’m sorry, A. I shouldn’t have gotten into all that. I know it’s not the same as the stuff you have with your mom.”
A subtle shift, gaze snapping to mine, eyes soft and confused. “It’s not a contest.” His expression wavers. “It’s just…it might be for different reasons, but I know the pain you’re talking about.”
“I know you do. I’ve always known.”
He pauses, hesitates, then lets the words spill out, “I’ve always known too.”
Atlas has got that beautiful pouty expression on his face, and I can’t help myself. I reach out and rest my hand against his cheek, my thumb against his bottom lip, tracing. He leans into my hold, and we gaze into each other’s eyes.
Just looking. Really seeing each other.
And letting the other see.
It was a bittersweet discussion, one we’ve had for a long time without exchanging words, so it was nice to finally speak those things that had gone unspoken.
I feel the bed jerk a little, and before I know it, I’m kissing him.
His nose presses against my cheek, his mouth wet against mine, teeth nibbling at my bottom lip. Our hands are greedy as we claw at each other. My body has seized control, desperate for Atlas’s kisses and touch to take away my pain or help me forget. It can’t do those things, but damn, it sure helps.
Soon, I’m lying across the bed with Atlas on top of me, pinning my wrists at my sides as his tongue invades my mouth. Our tongues are lost in a wet dance, his breath colliding with my face.
I feel warmth against my cheek… A tear? Atlas’s?
All I can think about is making him feel better, giving him pleasure to replace all the pain we’ve shown each other tonight, so I keep on kissing.
Desire pulses through me, a deep hunger to ease my own pain and his. To help us race against the darkness. When he releases my wrists, I plant one hand on the back of his head. “Atlas, I want you.”
“I can tell,” he whispers into my mouth, and we both chuckle.
God, what this guy does to me.
“No, I meant I want you in me, right now.”
He pulls back, propped up on his forearms, gazing down with that cocky expression on his smug face—the sort of face I would’ve wanted to punch back when we were in high school. Now, it’s hot as sin. “I knew you wouldn’t last long without wanting to bottom for me,” he teases. There’s still sadness in his eyes, but there’s light too, the part of him that can make the best of things even with all that pain.
After everything that came up, we both need a release.
“They’re gonna come looking for us at some point,” he adds.
“I don’t give a fuck. I need this, and you do too.”
“Where did this cock-hungry Troy come from?”
And I am Cock-hungry Troy. I’m not ashamed of it.
I reach into my pocket and retrieve a condom, which he eyes. “It’s like you were planning this.”
“Just prepared. But I’ve been tested. All negatives.”
“Same here.”
“And as long as we’re just fucking around with each other…”
I don’t even need to finish my thought before his eyes narrow. “Naughty Troy. You saying you want me raw inside you?”
“Yes.”
“In our parents’ house?”
He’s right. We can’t. We shouldn’t.
“Yes.” That’s not the right answer, but I don’t give a fuck. “I like to repay my debts quickly.”
Now he’s all smiles—maybe my distraction is working after all—and then his gaze shifts. Is he seriously considering this?
“We should get some lube if we’re going to try that.”
I shake my head. “Oh, my sweet noob…”
His eyes widen. “Won’t that hurt?”
“You think I’d be asking if I didn’t want a little pain?”
He snickers, his expression vacillating between uneasiness and excitement.
Just how I like him.