Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 86706 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 434(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86706 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 434(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
“I hope he’s not disappointed in me.”
In my heart, I knew Jacob would’ve loved Tristan. I just didn’t know how to prove that to him. “Remember when you told me you used to study near-death experiences?”
“Yeah?”
“I know you were more removed from the reality of death back then, but you said you felt like there might be a reason for bad things happening, and I keep hoping you still feel that way now that you know about Jacob.”
“I’ll admit, it’s harder to find the good in loss when it’s your own flesh and blood.”
“Yeah, I can imagine. But you believe there’s an afterlife. And if there is, you’ll get to see him again.”
“I hope that’s true. I’ve never hoped for that more. He’ll be the first person I run to.” He wiped his eyes. “Maybe by then I’ll have written some music he’s proud of so I don’t have to be embarrassed.”
“I think he’d be mortified to know you’ve read those passages.”
“But they’re the truth. And honestly? His words have been my biggest kick in the ass to do better, to make him proud.”
“I’m certain Jacob is pretty damn proud already. I’m still alive, and my father is nowhere to be found. In the short time you’ve known about your son, you’ve been a thousand times the father mine ever was. I know if Jacob were here, you would devote your life to making up for lost time.”
He suddenly slowed the car.
“What are you doing?” I asked, gripping the armrest.
“There’s something I need to say to you, and I want to pull over to do it. I want to be able to look you in the eyes.” He parked the car on a residential side street, turned off the engine, and turned his body toward me. “I’ve been meaning to tell you something.”
My palms felt sweaty. “Okay...”
“I know you say you don’t care about your dad anymore. But there’s a chance that what he did still affects your view of yourself on a subconscious level. Please don’t ever use his insane life decision as a gauge for your value as a person. I need you to understand how special you are and that you’re capable of anything you put your mind to.”
I nodded after a moment. “I don’t undervalue myself consciously, but maybe what he did does impact me in ways I don’t realize. Not sure how it couldn’t.” I sighed. “Lord knows, I don’t make the best life decisions.”
“Like dating guys you’re too good for…” he added.
“Ethan, you mean?”
“I know how you look at someone when you catch feelings. I’ve been fortunate enough to be a recipient of that. You don’t look at him like you used to look at me. And maybe that sounds arrogant as fuck, but if I can’t be with you, at the very least, I want you with someone who makes you smile, who rocks your fucking world. You deserve that. And you don’t need to stay in Shady Hills your whole life, if it brings back bad memories. You can go anywhere you want…do anything you want.”
How can he say that? “Actually, no, I can’t. I don’t have the means.”
“I’ll give you whatever you need to live the life you want. I’ll buy you a house anywhere you want to live in the world. I’ll pay if you want to go back to school.”
Whoa. “No, you won’t. I would never let you do that, Tristan.”
“I figured you wouldn’t take money from me. So I had to get creative.”
I moved back in my seat. “What are you talking about?”
“I went to talk to your mother earlier this week. I asked her for advice on how to help make things easier for you. She agreed that you wouldn’t take money. So I asked if I could give it to her, if she’d hold it for you.”
Why does this feel like a gut punch? “I wish you hadn’t done that.”
“I have millions of dollars, Emily. More than I know what to do with. And I have nothing to spend it on. Please let me give you the freedom to do something that truly makes you happy. I could never repay you for what you’ve done for me.” Tristan shook his head. “I won’t take it back.”
“How much money did you give her?”
“A million.”
I nearly lost my lunch. “Are you insane?”
“It’s a drop in the bucket for me.”
All my blood rushed to my head. “Why didn’t my mother tell me about this?”
“I asked her not to until I had a chance to explain it.”
Was I crazy for feeling disappointed that someone had given me a million dollars? “I can’t believe this.”
He put his arm on the back of my seat. “Don’t be upset. Just let me do this for you.”
He wasn’t getting it. My disappointment wasn’t about the money. Tristan wanted me to go anywhere I wanted and have adventures. But having the freedom to do that made me realize my heart only wanted to be with him.