Total pages in book: 108
Estimated words: 105815 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 529(@200wpm)___ 423(@250wpm)___ 353(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 105815 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 529(@200wpm)___ 423(@250wpm)___ 353(@300wpm)
I gaze up at him, the strong face, those broad shoulders.
My heart tightens. He’s my family, too.
I grab his face and kiss him long and hard right there in Carl’s shabby kitchen.
“Thank you for helping,” I murmur as I rub my thumb down his jawline.
“I didn’t do anything.”
He is so wrong.
He was incredibly strong and supportive, all while wondering what happened between me and Donovan. “I wish we were somewhere cool, like a rooftop with the stars looking at us, so I could tell you everything I need to say. I wish you hadn’t left me last night, River. Is… I mean, are we okay?”
“You’re mine, Anastasia. I can’t let you go. I did once.”
“I should have ended things with Donovan after this summer, but part of that was not wanting to give up being at the house, seeing everyone, seeing you…” I stop, uncertainty tugging at me, at how he’ll take my words. “I did love him, but it’s nothing like…” this. “Am I a terrible person?”
“Never.” He pulls me into him, spreading his legs so I can fit there. He gazes down at me.
“What?” I say when he hasn’t said anything, just searching my face.
“Rainbow, I love you,” he says in a quiet voice. “Crazy. Insane. Like can’t get you out of my head since that night in the library. It all happened so fast, and I was looking out for Donovan…then you showed up in my bedroom, and I figured out your name, and I knew I’d fucked up. Watching you with him nearly killed me, it did, and I pushed through, but that’s done. You, you…slay me, baby girl.”
Emotion whips at me, sneaking in and wrapping around my heart. A tear slips down my face, and he wipes it away.
“Ah, don’t cry.”
I fell for him a long time ago, the feeling born that moment in the library when he dropped his pen. The way he gazed at me, like he couldn’t take his eyes off me, the way he pretended to be reading a book. Oh, I tried to push him to the back of my mind, to forget him, because it was the right thing to do for Donovan, but I couldn’t. He’s always been part of my thoughts, lying in wait, itching to bubble to the surface. That feeling blossomed and grew solid the morning he shared the sunrise with me.
You stay gold, Anastasia, breathe every breath, read all the books, get into law school, fuck the haters, and stay beautiful.
Who says things like that? HE DOES.
He believes in me. Accepts me the way I am.
I’m in love with his random personality, the tender way he talks about his mom, his complexity as a person, his vulnerability, his three things that guide him…
The truth is, I never had these feelings for Donovan. This consuming need. This feeling of being connected by something bigger than me.
“I love you, Snake.” Another tear escapes and I bite my lip. “Sorry. It’s just…” I pause, circling back to some of what I think has been worrying him. “I know we haven’t spent a lot of time one on one, but we didn’t have to. Sometimes big moments happen in a heartbeat, like the library. I believe in destiny and fate, I do. Even when you pretended to hate me and wouldn’t look at me, my body knew the exact moment you got on the elevator behind me. I’m saying stuff that feels too soon, I know, and I don’t want to put pressure on you. I know you have enough, you do, and I do too, but things are moving fast, it’s the end of the term, and we feel so fragile, but…”
“But?”
“You and me? We’re going to stay gold—together. Can you see it?” My breath catches.
A slow smile curls his lips. “When all this is over, I’m going to tell you about a dream I had once about my dad—maybe not a dream, whatever—but yeah, I see it. Gold. It feels good, baby girl.” He kisses me soft and easy, taking his time, his tongue tangling with mine as my hands curl around his neck.
24
The next day, I head up the steps to class. I can’t stop smiling. There’s a girl in front of me, lingering on the steps. She’s wearing a mini skirt and heeled Chucks that match her hair. I slide in next to her, feeling the tingles at her proximity. We don’t speak, our hands brushing as we walk inside and head to the elevator.
I let her get on first, then follow. She slaps the button for our floor. I drop my bag, back her against the wall, and tilt her face up. We kiss, my lips eating at hers, my hunger ratcheting up, to feel all of her, to consume her. I want to take it slow, to savor us, but it’s hard.