Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 109903 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 550(@200wpm)___ 440(@250wpm)___ 366(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 109903 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 550(@200wpm)___ 440(@250wpm)___ 366(@300wpm)
Thea would have been starting her fifth year with the Ravens when Kevin started his freshman year, but Kevin and Riko grew up at Evermore around the Raven line. Kevin would have known Thea her entire five-year career as a Raven. Neil wondered how long it took them to fall for each other and what Thea thought of Kevin's transfer to the Foxes. He was more curious how Kevin found room in his heart for someone else when he lived and breathed Exy. It seemed impossible that a man could be so devoted to more than one thing.
Maybe Nicky and Kevin were both right, then. Neil's thoughts spun back to Andrew, and he said, "No one else knows about Andrew's sexuality."
"As far as I know, you and I are the only ones," Renee confirmed. "Andrew told me last year when the others started talking about us. He didn't want me getting any ideas from their gossip, he said."
"But Aaron and Nicky," Neil protested. "I know they've only known him a couple years, but they're with him all the time. How could they not have figured it out by now?"
"I assume Andrew's medicine makes him a hard read for even them," Renee said. "More importantly, Andrew does not want them to know. He and Aaron aren't ready for a conversation this serious yet. They have too many other problems to work through first. And you know as well as I do Nicky can't keep a secret to save his life."
Yet, Renee had said, which meant Andrew intended on fixing things with his brother at some point. Neil didn't know if that was her optimism speaking or if she knew it as fact. He didn't know what she and Andrew talked about when they stood off by themselves. Thinking it was Exy strategies was laughable. Imagining them having a serious conversation—as serious as a drugged Andrew could be, anyway—about Andrew's closeted sexuality was equally impossible.
"Then why can I know?" Neil asked.
"Perhaps he knows you won't use it against him," Renee said.
There was a gentle warning in her words, and Neil bristled despite himself. His teammates' relationships were interesting to observe from a distance but otherwise inconsequential. Neil didn't care about his teammates' sexualities because it had nothing to do with his survival. Andrew's sexuality was surprising, but it certainly wasn't ammunition to use against him.
It took a little work to keep the edge out of his voice. "If he doesn't care whether or not I know, he could have told me himself at Halloween when I asked him about you. He didn't have to send me all the way here."
"Maybe he thought it past time you and I got to know each other a little better." Renee studied Neil. "I am not the girl I once was, but the shade of my old life will always exist inside of me. That is what helps me connect with Andrew. I am hoping it will help me connect with you.
"I do not know your story," she continued before Neil could react. "If you've trusted Andrew with anything, he hasn't shared the details with me and he never will. But if you are as like us as we first predicted you to be, perhaps one day you can also come to see me as a friend. We're all here because we have problems, Neil. That doesn't mean all our problems are the same. Dan and Matt try to understand the things I've seen and done, but they will never fully succeed. Andrew understands me, and I him. It's comforting knowing someone else has been where we once were. If either Andrew or I can help you, please know we are here."
Neil didn't answer that; he couldn't. It was too much to think about and too much to consider. He wanted to ask her about the trial and what it was like giving testimony. He needed to know how the courts protected her and if it was worth it. If he went to the FBI in spring with proof to take his father down he'd at least like an idea of what he was getting into. That would open up far too many questions than he wanted to deal with today, though. He wasn't willing to trust her with even the half-truths he'd given Andrew.
Renee didn't look surprised or disappointed by his long silence. She gave him a minute to make up his mind, then nodded and changed the subject with an ease that left him reeling.
"Maybe now that I've sated your curiosity you can help me. I need a boy's opinion on gifts for Aaron and Andrew. For their birthday," she said at the blank look on Neil's face. "They didn't celebrate it last year, and Nicky says they haven't celebrated it since they moved in together, but hopefully this one is different. They turn twenty on Saturday. That's something worth commemorating, isn't it?"
"I guess so," Neil said.
His half-hearted agreement was good enough for her, and she motioned to the shelf in front of her. "I'm thinking something practical they can use. What do you think?"
It took them two stores and almost half an hour of searching before Renee finally found what she wanted. By that point it was coming up quick on Renee's next class. Neil still had an hour to kill and he was only a couple minutes from Fox Tower, so he parted ways with Renee at Perimeter Road. She headed across the Green to campus and Neil went the other way to the athletes' dormitory. His room was blessedly empty. Neil dropped his backpack on the floor, sprawled face-down on Matt's couch, and let his thoughts run in curious circles over everything Renee had told him.
By the time he got up for class again, he still didn't know what to think.
-
Frantic thumping on the suite door startled Neil and Matt from their TV lunch on Saturday. Matt scrambled to find the remote where it'd fallen between the cushions, so Neil put his plate aside and hopped up to answer the door. The girls knew Matt kept the door unlocked if he was in the room, so Neil expected to find someone lost on their way to another team's room. Instead a wild-eyed Nicky was waiting in the hall.