Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 122219 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 611(@200wpm)___ 489(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 122219 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 611(@200wpm)___ 489(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
Late into the night, Yara and Willow had retired to bed. My mind was moving too quickly to do such a thing, so I found myself trying to break through the thoughts racing through me.
“Avery?” Willow whispered, walking onto the back porch to find me standing there, staring out into the darkened sky. I hadn’t been able to fall asleep. My mind had been spinning for days now. It was a little past two in the morning, the morning of my wedding, and I didn’t feel…happy.
I was supposed to feel happy, right?
I looked over at her and pushed out a smile. “What are you doing up? It’s late.”
“I know,” she said as she moved to stand beside me. Her eyes glanced up at the star-drunk sky, and a small smile curled her lips. “Do you know how much I love you?” she asked.
I laughed slightly and shook my head. “Go to bed, Willow.”
“No, I mean it, Avery. I love you so much and have always looked up to you. I don’t think I tell you that enough.”
“You tell me all the time.”
“I know.” She nodded. “And still, it’s not enough.” We moved to the top step of the porch and took a seat. She leaned her head against my shoulder as we stared out. “Not only were you my big sister growing up but you were the mama I never had the chance to have. You were my Mary Poppins. I don’t think I ever thanked you for that. For being a motherly figure to me all my life.”
“I’d do anything for you.”
“I know.” She sniffled.
“Are you crying?”
“Only a little.”
“Why?”
“Because sometimes love feels so big in my chest that it leaks from my eyes.”
I chuckled. My sisters must’ve taken all the emotions and kept them for themselves. Sometimes, I wish I cried more. Maybe it would’ve moved some of the heaviness resting inside me.
She lifted her head from my shoulder. “But Avery…I was thinking about it earlier. You’ve been such a mother figure to Yara and me all our lives, but you haven’t had that for yourself,” Willow said.
Her words felt like a punch to my stomach.
“I don’t say that to make you feel bad. I only say that because I want you to know that I can be that for you sometimes…the one you can lean on.”
I bit my bottom lip. “What if my leaning gets too heavy?”
“It won’t,” she swore. “But if it ever did, I’d join a gym or something and become stronger.”
I laughed. “Thanks, Will.”
“Always.” She fiddled with her hands a little. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“Does Wesley make you feel?”
“Feel what?”
“Anything,” she said.
I sighed and rested my head on top of hers. I couldn’t answer her question that night because it was too late to debate such things. All the bills had been paid. All the flowers delivered. All that was left were a few “I do’s.”
“It’s past midnight,” I whispered.
“Yes.”
“It’s officially my wedding day.”
Willow lifted her head and looked at me with the tiniest smile. For a moment, I saw flashes of my mother within her eyes. The kindest, softest comforting eyes filled with so much love. It almost brought me to tears as I stared at her.
I rested my head back against her shoulder as she wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me against her side.
“Everything’s going to be all right, right, Willow?”
“Everything’s always all right. Even when the voices in our heads tell us differently.” She then stood and held a hand toward me. “Now come on. It’s time to get some rest before the big day.”
12
AVERY
It took me an hour to pull myself out of bed on my wedding day. Then once I was up, everything moved at warp speed. People ushered me around, makeup and hair were all a flurry. Willow added flowers to my hair, and Yara touched up my lipstick. Daddy didn’t cry, but his eyes were misty. He still called Wesley by another name. Everyone in town was at the chapel.
Everyone but Nathan, I suppose.
My heart beat at the speed of light.
My brain filtered through a million thoughts.
“Can I get a moment alone with the bride?” Tatiana asked, ushering everyone out of the room. It was as if she’d known the overwhelm hitting me. She walked over to me, wearing the most beautiful strapless coral dress, which showed off every perfect curve she had. Gosh, I bet Mama and Tatiana were such a good time when they were younger.
Gosh, I wish Mama was here.
Tatiana walked over to me with a small treasure chest in her hands. She gave me her warm smile and led me over to the couch to take a seat. She sat beside me, placed the chest on her right side, and then took my hands.
“How are you?” she asked.
Don’t ask me that, Tatiana.