Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 94609 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 473(@200wpm)___ 378(@250wpm)___ 315(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94609 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 473(@200wpm)___ 378(@250wpm)___ 315(@300wpm)
“You’re terrified.”
I swallowed hard as my heart pounded aggressively against my ribs. Who did this guy think he was? Who was he to tell me who I’d been? The love of my life. That was who he was.
Keep pushing him away, Willow. Just keep pushing.
“Oh, screw you, Theo,” I spat out.
“You already did that, so what else?”
“What do you mean what else?”
“What else do you have to give me? Because, no offense, I like fucking you, but that’s just not enough. I want more with you. I can’t keep fucking your body when you stopped giving me your mind out of nowhere.”
“You don’t want my mind,” I argued.
“Don’t you get it?” He leaned in toward my ear and brushed his mouth against the edge. “I want every thought that lives in that beautiful mess of your mind.”
My whole chest began to ache as I stood there in the bathroom, feeling my stomach building with a mixture of butterflies and killer hornets. I was going to break his freaking heart.
I hated the whole situation. I hated him pressed against me, but I also hated the idea of him moving away. I hated that he could see me in ways others couldn’t, and I hated the fact that I loved feeling seen for the first time in my life. I hated his words, but I loved his mouth.
How could someone make me feel so conflicted for the first time in my life? How did he manage to see me? How did he see past the mask I’d worn my whole life? And how in the hell was I going to go through with breaking his heart?
I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Theo?”
“Yes?”
“I’m leaving tonight.”
He let me go.
He stepped away.
I missed him already even though he still stood there.
“What?” he questioned.
“I think my time in Westin Lake is over. Listen, I had a great time getting to know you. I think you’re a great guy, and—”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait. Time-out. What the hell is going on?” he shouted, mystified. “Are you breaking up with me?”
“Breaking up with you?” I huffed even though I wanted to sob. “Theo…we weren’t…together.”
And there it was.
The heartbreak.
It flashed in his eyes and rolled through his chest.
And the moment his heart broke? Mine shattered.
He started to close himself off again. I saw him retreating to the cold man I first met. “Th-then what have we been do-doing?” he quietly asked, stuttering through his words.
Oh, Theo. I am so sorry.
“We were just two people who had sex a few times.”
“Sex?” he blurted out. “This was just sex? You and me? Us? Is that all it was to you?”
I knew what he was getting at, and the uncertainty in the pit of my stomach hurt me because I saw it in his eyes…love.
It was there.
It was real.
Which meant it was time to do what I had to do.
“Yes. It was just sex,” I quietly agreed with a small nod.
That sliced through his spirit. I saw the hurt that pierced him, and I hated that I was the one who delivered it. But I didn’t know how not to hurt him. I didn’t know how not to run away.
Because Mrs. Lane was right.
I didn’t deserve love.
Especially from a man like Theodore Langford. Because he would’ve loved me completely.
“Willow,” he murmured, his voice soaked in heartbreak, “I don’t know what I did wrong, but I’m sorry. I, well, if you could just…” He sighed and sniffled before clearing his throat. “Please don’t leave me,” he begged. “Just stay. Please,” he pleaded. “I don’t know what happened, but I’ll do whatever you need me to do to make this better. I’ll be whatever you need me to be in order to make this work. I’ll be better for you. I’ll be whatever you need me to be. Just…don’t go. P-please. Don’t go.”
Every piece of my soul died right then.
He was begging me to stay, which was exactly why I had to go.
I shook my head and crossed my arms over my chest. “Sorry, Theo. I’m leaving. This is over.”
That was the final nail in the coffin. I saw the shift in his whole demeanor. His eyes grew ice cold. His body tensed up. His jaw locked. He was disappearing right before my eyes.
“Okay.” He nodded. “Then do me one big favor?”
“What’s that?”
“Stay the fuck gone forever.” With that, he turned and walked away. He headed out of his house straight to his boat. I listened as he sped off toward the middle of the lake.
I was gone before he came back.
CHAPTER 37
Theo
Willow was gone.
She left a letter for me on my dining room table.
I refused to read it because no matter what it said, the outcome was still the same.
She left me.
Just like the others.
CHAPTER 38
Willow
Idrove around in Big Bird for days, not knowing where to go. Not knowing where I’d end up. Feeling so lost and confused that I was worried about my own well-being. So I went to the only place I could feel some sense of safety.