Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 99434 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 497(@200wpm)___ 398(@250wpm)___ 331(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 99434 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 497(@200wpm)___ 398(@250wpm)___ 331(@300wpm)
“It was my pleasure. I can’t wait to do it again very soon…only next time…with my tongue.”
Chapter 19
* * *
Layla
It’s big.
And hard.
It’s been a really, really long time.
I chewed on my pen cap and stared down at my notebook.
Really, really hard, I added. So much so that apparently it deserved two spaces in the pro column. And I underlined the really. Both of them.
I’d gotten ready early, so all I needed to do was slip into my dress. Since Gray wasn’t due for another half hour, I’d started a pro and con analysis of sleeping with him. After twenty minutes, my pro list was pretty long, yet my con list had only one item. But if I’d dropped my collection of pros and the single con onto a scale, I was pretty sure the weight of that one negative might still tip the scale to its side.
Could break my heart again.
That was really my only reservation anymore. I’d forgiven him. I’d accepted everything he’d told me as the truth. I’d even admitted to myself that we were unfinished business I couldn’t move on from, no matter how hard I’d tried.
Yet I was still terrified. Deep down, part of me worried that I wasn’t any different than my mother—that I wasn’t capable of seeing a situation for what it really was and would accept a man who was something other than what I ultimately wanted.
I thought back to the day I’d realized my mother was in denial. I was fifteen, and my dad had left the day before for his usual four days on the west coast—with his real family. My mom was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking a cup of tea while looking through travel brochures for Hawaii. I’d gotten excited and asked if we were going on a vacation.
She’d smiled and said yes. “Your father was going to surprise us, but I found them in his suitcase when I was unpacking him from his business trip.”
Business trip. That’s what she always called the time he spent with his wife and other daughter.
My smile had faded. Sure. He was going to surprise us with a trip. They weren’t brochures his wife had stuck in there for him to pick a nice place for his real family. I’d shaken my head and said, “Mom…there is no trip.”
“Of course there is,” she’d said.
I’d searched her face, thinking she couldn’t possibly believe it. But she had.
It made me sad.
We never went to Hawaii that summer. But Dad did happen to have a two-week absence, and when he’d called to talk to us, the area code for his business trip was 808. Maui.
How could she not have seen it? I was just a kid, and I saw it clear as day. The only logical explanation was that she justified everything in her head because she wanted to be with him. And admitting that the man she loved was a liar would have meant it was wrong for her to be with him. Love is supposed to be blind, but it’s not supposed to make you deaf, dumb, and stupid, too.
Putting away my notebook, I decided to get dressed. If I truly planned on giving this relationship a chance, I couldn’t spend my pre-date time reminiscing about my parents’ poor example of a relationship and all of my trust issues.
I’d decided to wear a gown, rather than a cocktail dress. Black tie could go either way, and I was in the mood to dress up. I’d spent an inordinate amount of money on the thing and had only worn it once—to a charity event I’d attended for a client along with a few others at my firm. It was the most beautiful, deep shade of midnight blue. It had a simple, sleek silhouette with a neckline that cut low, but still managed to cover up everything and pull off elegant. Delicate beading cinched my waist in a belt-like pattern and made my curves seem even curvier. When I’d worn it to the previous event, I’d gotten a ton of compliments—from men and women.
My buzzer rang right on time, and I told Gray to come up while I lined my lips in an extra bright shade of red. He stepped off the elevator just as I unlocked the front door, and I let out a little sigh. God, he looked gorgeous.
His usually messy hair was slicked back and to the side, and his tuxedo fit him perfectly. He looked like an old-fashioned movie star, a gentleman. Although when he prowled to the door and wrapped his arm around my waist, his mouth was anything but gentlemanly.
“You look good enough to eat.”
I rested my hands on his chest and teased, “Maybe I need to lose another bet at the party tonight.”
Gray growled and took my mouth in a kiss. I loved that his hands always found my face when he kissed me. He cupped my cheeks and tilted my head to the side while he sucked on my tongue. I imagined how it might feel if his head was between my legs and he sucked there with the same intensity. Before he broke the kiss, his tongue retreated and then came back to flutter against mine.