Total pages in book: 51
Estimated words: 48271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 48271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
“If that’s true, then why didn’t you respond to her?” she yells, her voice tinged with anger. “Why didn’t you tell her we were together?”
“Because I was knee-deep in shit when she messaged, and I forgot,” I snap. “I know that’s a shitty excuse, Elle, but it’s all I got because it’s the truth.”
“Or maybe it’s because you’re not as certain about all of this as you thought.” The words fly out of her mouth like daggers, each one hitting its target with precision.
“What did you just say?”
She drops her gaze, refusing to repeat herself.
“You can’t seriously think that?”
“I don’t know,” she cries. “I feel like I don’t know anything right now.”
“Bullshit!” I jab a finger in her direction. “You know me, and you damn well know I wouldn’t be trying to have a fucking baby with you if I had any doubts.”
She throws her hands up. “And yet, here we are, fighting and questioning everything!”
“I’m not questioning anything. You are.”
“You’re right, I am,” she chokes out, her resolve crumbling into tears. “I’m questioning why I’m not getting pregnant. Why it hurts so much to know you were with someone else even though I already knew you were.” Each word tumbles out of her with so much pain and anguish, it practically paralyzes me. “Now, I’m left wondering if this is all happening for a reason. That maybe no matter how much I want this with you or how much I love you, maybe it’s just not meant to be.”
The final part lands like a crippling blow to my chest, leaving me gasping for breath.
“Jesus, Ellie, no.” I barely manage the words as I step toward her.
“No, please don’t,” she pleads between sobs, recoiling as if my touch might burn her. Tears carve a path of devastation down her face, casting every feature in heartbreak as she slowly backs away. “I’m sorry. So sorry, but I can’t do this right now. I need some time.”
Panic claws its way through my chest with each step she takes. “No. Don’t leave.” I reach for her out of desperation, my fingers closing around nothing but air as she flees from the shop, leaving me with the echo of her sobs and the darkness of my own despair.
Ellie
It’s crazy how drastically life can change in such a short amount of time. One moment you could be living out a dream far more beautiful than you ever imagined, only to have it cruelly shattered the next. All because you foolishly let your emotions get the best of you.
My throat tightens as I suppress the bitter regret that has wrapped itself around my heart, intertwining with the profound ache of longing I feel without Gunnar and Bear by my side.
These past few days have been absolute torture. I miss them terribly, but know I need this time to pull myself together. Not just for me, but for Gunnar too. He doesn’t deserve to deal with me being such a basket case.
Right when I thought things couldn’t get any more complicated, fate throws me another curveball, this one offering a glimmer of hope in the form of a home pregnancy test. Despite being certain I had gotten my period.
Turns out it may have been spotting, which can happen early on. Or mother nature just wants to screw with me and it’s a wacky period because of the roller coaster of emotions I have been on the last few days. Obviously, I’m hoping for the first possibility, but I’m preparing for the latter because the last thing I need is another blow to the heart.
Fortunately, I have my three closest girlfriends by my side for it. Harlow, Penny, and Hollis huddle around me in my living room, their expressions a mix of concern and unwavering support. I reached out to them earlier, needing help to sort through all these emotions and they didn’t hesitate.
As we impatiently wait for the results of all three pregnancy tests I took, I recount every detail of what happened at Gunnar’s the other night.
Their expressions fluctuate through a range of emotions: first shock, then anger, and finally, a deep sadness at how it all ended.
“I’m so sorry, Ellie,” Penny softly murmurs, her slender fingers enveloping my hand in a gentle squeeze. “I can’t imagine how much that hurt to see.”
I swallow hard, trying to fight back the fresh wave of tears. “It did, but I should have handled it better. I reacted so badly, you guys,” my voice fades away at the admission as guilt consumes me.
“Of course you did,” Harlow inserts firmly. “We all would have. Any sane person would.”
“Definitely.” Hollis chimes in with a nod of agreement, her brown messy bun bouncing on top of her head.
“Maybe, but it wasn’t Gunnar’s fault. He didn’t invite her there.”
Though, I do wish he had responded to her damn messages. Honest mistake or not, it could have spared us all, especially my heart because the image of that night will forever be etched into my memory.