Total pages in book: 244
Estimated words: 236705 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1184(@200wpm)___ 947(@250wpm)___ 789(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 236705 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1184(@200wpm)___ 947(@250wpm)___ 789(@300wpm)
We round the corner on the way to her building, and I make a wiggling motion with my fingers. “Tell me who he is. I can’t wait to charm him for the cameras.”
“One of our other clients. We look out for our own. His name is TJ Hardman.”
I nearly stop in my tracks, but that might reveal too much.
Like, say, the fact that I’d been falling madly in love with TJ when I fucked it all up. That he was a funny, clever, vulnerable man who made me feel like I was the only one.
What an idiot I was.
As I walk with Holly, I replay that day in Venice. I wish I’d thought before I accused him of coming to LA to steal a deal out from under me. I wish I’d taken a fucking breath before I suggested he used me. I tried, though, to say I was sorry, but it was too late. TJ still left.
“TJ Hardman the author?” I ask evenly, giving nothing away since Holly doesn’t know we were involved. “Or perhaps is there a Troy Jett Hardman somewhere?”
“Wouldn’t it be funny if his initials stood for that? But I’ve no idea what they stand for.”
I do.
“I bet they stand for Thomas John,” she continues as we sweep inside the building. “In any case, he’s also in a bit of a pickle.”
If he’s involved with another guy, I will lose it. I clench my fists. “Does he have inappropriate pictures out there too?”
Say no. Please say no.
“That’s not his issue at all.” But she doesn’t say what his problem is as we step into a waiting lift.
“But he needs a fake boyfriend, and I have to pretend I like him?” I want to make sure I understand the role completely.
“No,” she says as if that’s crazy.
“Thank God.” I breathe a huge sigh of relief as we shoot up ten stories. “For a moment there, I thought you were serious.”
Holly flashes me a confused look as we exit on the eleventh floor. “I am serious. And I am intensely serious when I say I don’t want you to pretend to like him. I want you to convince the whole fucking world that you’re madly in love with him.”
Evidently, wrecking balls come in pairs—this second one of the day slams into my gut.
I’ll have to pretend I’m in love with the man who destroyed my heart.
Though I can only imagine how TJ will feel when he sees photos of me wrapped up with William.
When I look down the hall, I don’t have to wonder how TJ feels.
He’s headed my way right now, and I can see for myself. He hates me.
4
THE ICE AGE
Jude
This is the first time I’ve seen TJ since the argument, but it isn’t the first time I’ve tried.
A few days after he hit the road like an ex in a country song, my best friend, Olivia, arrived in Los Angeles from London for a voiceover job. Grateful to see a friendly face, I hugged her for ages on the porch of the Airbnb seconds after a Lyft dropped her off.
“You’re here for one reason,” I told her. “To make my life bearable again.”
“Dramatic much?”
“Dramatic always.” I sighed, letting all the air leak out of me, weighed down by sadness. I dropped my head onto her shoulder. “But with such a good reason. TJ broke it off.”
“Talk to me,” she said.
That evening as we walked along the surf, I gave her chapter and verse of what happened, how I woke up to a piece in the trades reporting that TJ had sold his book rights. How right after that, I learned from Holly that Webflix had tabled a queer romance with me in favor of TJ’s book. How TJ told me he’d done the deal while he was visiting me in LA and how it all reeked of him using me.
“You fucking idiot. You absolutely massive, incredibly ridiculous idiot,” Olivia said, verbally thumping me on the head.
But was I that ridiculous? The evidence added up, after all. “Doesn’t it seem like he came out here for work, though? He was busy wheeling and dealing with Webflix at the same time he was romancing me. And then when we talked about it, he said I wasn’t what he wanted. Translation: A relationship with me wasn’t worth the effort.”
She smacked my shoulder. “It doesn’t sound like you talked, Jude. Sounds like you fought.”
I bristled. But then I peeked at the painful memories of our fight and my role instigating it. I grimaced, realizing her assessment was starkly accurate. “Yes, well, it was intense.”
“Exactly my point. You both have intense feelings for each other.”
“Had,” I corrected.
“Have and had. As in, I saw the way he looked at you in London.”
“I know we have chemistry. Chemistry isn’t the point.”
“I’m not talking about chemistry, you wanker. When you two were in London, you were all he wanted. He looked at you like he was crazy for you. Like he was more than infatuated.”