Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 70510 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 70510 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
“Then we aren’t doing that,” I said immediately. “What else can we do?”
He gave a slight shake of his head. “Unfortunately…nothing. We have to wait and see. We have to hope.”
I dropped my gaze because that was not the answer I wanted.
My dad’s hand went to my shoulder. “Sweetheart, even if we had the answers, it wouldn’t matter. Science can only go so far before—”
“There’s God. I know. I just hope he’s here for this…”
When I came home, Atlas was already showered and ready to go to my parents’ place to celebrate.
We weren’t going anywhere. I had canceled it.
“Hey, baby.” He left the couch and came forward to kiss me. But something on my face must have changed his mind because he stilled. “I knew there was something wrong.” He glanced down at my hand, as if he expected the ring to be missing, that I changed my mind about being with him.
I was afraid he was the one who would change his mind.
“I need to tell you something…”
He took a step back, like he needed space without even knowing what the problem was. His hands moved to his hips, and he stared at the floor for a second, gathering his bearings. “Alright.” He lifted his chin and looked at me again, his eyes braced for impact.
“You can’t get mad.”
“Fuck…this isn’t a good start.”
“I’m serious, Atlas. You’re going to want to get upset, but the last thing I need right now is for you to explode and storm out of here. You need to stay calm. You need to be positive.”
His eyes narrowed. “Okay…you’re freaking me out. Be positive… People only say that—”
“Just be calm. I need you to be calm right now.”
His voice raised. “How do you expect me to be calm when you’re talking like this—”
“Just do as I say. Take a couple minutes if you need it. Breathe in…breathe out.”
He clenched his jaw in irritation.
I waited.
He paced for a minute, dragging his hand down his face, forcing himself to get out his anger in silence before he came back to me. The annoyance was still in his eyes, but he forced it to abate, closing his eyes and breathing. When he was finally calm, he opened his eyes and looked at me.
Here we go. “I’m pregnant.”
There was no reaction for a second or two, and then he drew a deep breath. A very deep breath. He took a step back, his eyes immediately forming a thin film of moisture, reflecting the TV behind me. He looked away, but his breaths came and went, quicker, deeper, so emotional that he didn’t know how to process what I’d just said. But when he spoke, his voice was quiet, deeply steady, a direct contradiction to the way his body behaved. “Atlantic City.”
“Yeah…”
He took another breath, his eyes on the floor.
“I was on the pill, but then I stopped taking it and…I wasn’t thinking.”
He continued to breathe hard, like he was about to hyperventilate.
“I’m not storming out. But I need space.”
Disappointment hit me. “Atlas—”
“I’m sorry.” He walked right past me and headed to the elevator. “I just…I need some time.”
19
Atlas
He opened the door and looked at me like this was the last thing he expected.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t know where else to go.”
He obviously knew why I was upset because he didn’t ask any questions. His hand grabbed my shoulder, and he stepped aside to welcome me inside. “You don’t need another place to go. You’re always welcome here.”
Mrs. Hamilton silently excused herself from the living room, abandoning her laptop on the couch, her glass of wine on the coffee table.
It should have been strange to run to my fiancé’s family for comfort, but it didn’t feel that way.
He guided me to the couch and took a seat beside me, his hand gently moving across my back.
I’d come all the way here, but now I didn’t know what to say. The walk here cooled me down a bit, the air hitting me in the face and lowering my temperature. When she’d told me…I didn’t know what to do.
It was a nightmare.
One that I had to relive over and over again.
When we got back together in Atlantic City, I didn’t think about being responsible, asking if she was still on the pill. The thought didn’t cross my mind, not when I was so happy to have her back.
But I should have asked.
I should have slowed down.
I shouldn’t have left her in the first place.
“This is all my fault…” I closed my eyes, the sorrow like a bucket of ice water. I’d have to watch Daisy go through what my ex-wife had gone through, but this would hurt more because I loved her more.
He continued to rub my back. “I took Daisy to see a colleague of mine. Said there wasn’t anything we could do unless we puncture the amniotic sac. Daisy declined. I agreed with her decision because in the end, it doesn’t matter.”