Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 94964 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 475(@200wpm)___ 380(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94964 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 475(@200wpm)___ 380(@250wpm)___ 317(@300wpm)
* * *
To his horror, he realized that he recognized them as they came closer. It was Janice and her sisters. “Oh lord,” he whispered and tried to hide between a bunch of shrubs, all the drunkenness gone from him.
* * *
“Such a beautiful day,” one of the girls said, “Don’t you think so, Janice?”
* * *
There was a huff. “Of course I do. Why are you stating the obvious Anne?”
* * *
“Well, you seemed preoccupied and I just wanted to point out what you were missing by brooding.”
* * *
“I am not brooding!”
* * *
“Being maudlin then.” It was a new voice so Arthur assumed it was Emily.
* * *
“I’m not-”
* * *
“Janice….” Emily sounded sad, “please stop lying to us.”
* * *
There was a sigh. “I’m sorry. I know you worry about me. I do assure you there is no need. I’m fine.”
* * *
“But you’re not,” Anne piped up. “You’re sad and brooding all the time. You barely speak anymore, Janice.”
“Is that why you’ve brought me out here to walk?”
* * *
“You always love being outdoors but you’ve been stuck inside, reading, curled up on your bed…we’re at a loss on how to help you, sister.”
* * *
“Maybe I don’t need help. Perhaps I should be allowed to read a book in my chambers without causing the entire household to go into a tizzy.”
* * *
“Maybe you should. But just tell us truthfully sister. Tell us how you’re feeling.”
* * *
“I feel…confused, saddened that I have disappointed you by my actions, and I do not know what I’m supposed to do now.”
* * *
There were cooing voices as the other two hastened to reassure her that nobody was disappointed in her. Arthur turned on his back, staring bleakly at the sky. He’d been wondering how Janice was doing, if she was alright. Now he knew.
* * *
The weight of guilt in his chest was heavy. He wished he was still drunk. He let himself submerge in the water, holding his breath, wondering if he should drown himself right then.
* * *
Should I make an offer for her?
* * *
He could not imagine doing that to her. She was safe in the bosom of her family. He could not snatch her from that only to immerse her in the steaming cesspit that was his life. It would be a worse cruelty than letting her feel a bit sad about her situation. She was lovely, she had a good dowry, she came from a good family; someone would make an offer for her sooner or later.
* * *
I wish that person could have been me.
* * *
He thrust that thought away from him as forcefully as he could but it persisted somewhere in the deep recesses of his mind.
Janice was relieved to come down to breakfast and find that she had a reply for the letter she’d sent a few days ago. She opened it eagerly, wanting to know what Miss Hannigan had to say. Three years ago, she had been caught in flagrante with a French count who had promptly decamped to the continent and left her to deal with everything on her own.
* * *
Janice had thought she might have some answers for her - some thoughts about a way forward. She could not wait to read the letter, glad that she was first at the breakfast table. Tearing open the letter, she began to read.
* * *
Dear Lady Janice,
* * *
I read your letter with horror and sympathy wishing that this had not happened to you. I know of your family and it gratifies me to hear that they are accepting of your new circumstances without condemnation. I was not so lucky.
* * *
My parents banished me to our country home, where I reside in disgrace. There is no recourse for this, no solution. There is only living with it. I wish you happiness, my dear. Try not to let this be the entirety of your life.
* * *
Yours faithfully,
* * *
Miss Judy Hannigan.
* * *
Janice sighed, putting the letter aside. She’d been hoping for enlightenment and all she’d found was hopelessness. Judy Hannigan thought that Janice was better off than she was and Janice had to acknowledge the truth of that. At least she hadn’t been banished anywhere.
* * *
“Good morning, Janice.”
* * *
She looked up to see her aunt Leticia enter the room, a soft smile on her face.
* * *
“Good morning Aunt. Did you sleep well?”
* * *
She nodded. “Very well. What of you?” she peered at Janice with concern.
* * *
Janice felt a lump in her throat, understanding truly that her family cared for her regardless of what had happened and what a blessing that was.
* * *
“I slept well, thank you, aunt.” She reached for the plate of hot cross buns. “You should have these while they’re hot.”