Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 89303 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 447(@200wpm)___ 357(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89303 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 447(@200wpm)___ 357(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
Daisy listened without judgment, her eyes soft.
“Sicily is…” I shook my head, unable to describe her. “Perfect in every goddamn way. She fits me in a way I never thought anyone would fit me. We have this connection that’s been there since the moment we met. But…I’m just not available to really appreciate it. The timing is wrong. I’m not ready. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready. And she doesn’t deserve that.”
Daisy stayed quiet.
“It was the right decision. I just wish I never got involved with her in the first place.”
“How are you guys at work?”
“It’s like nothing happened. She’s the consummate professional…as always.” She’d expressed her feelings and shed her tears, but then she picked herself up and carried on. I admired her so much for it, because I wished I could do the same.
“As much as I love Sicily, you’re right. The timing isn’t right, and you aren’t ready. I never should have pressured you into it. I think she was the right person, just at the wrong time. You were only together for a couple weeks, not enough time for serious feelings to form. So while it’s shitty, it’s not the end of the world. Maybe when you’re in a better place, you could try again.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know when or if that will ever happen, and she shouldn’t wait around for me. She deserves a stellar guy…someone better than me.”
I was on the couch with my feet on the coffee table, mindlessly staring at the TV as the bluish glow filled the living room of my apartment. I was anxious to have more than one beer, but it would be irresponsible to do so, so I didn’t. But I wished I could take something to drown out my thoughts, my misery.
A week had passed, and now that Sicily and I were officially done, people had stopped mentioning her. Other than the subtle awkwardness between us whenever we interacted, it was like it had never happened. She didn’t seem angry with me, and she obviously didn’t bring it up again.
Time to move on…I guess.
My phone vibrated on my thigh and lit up.
At this time of night, it was usually Sicily, still working because she was a bigger workaholic than I was.
But it wasn’t her.
It was the last person in the world I’d ever expect.
Catherine.
Can we talk?
I stared at the message for a minute straight, reading her words over and over, unable to believe she’d sent that. It wasn’t a different Catherine because there had always been just one Catherine in my life.
It was her.
The Catherine.
Her words paralyzed me, and all I could do was stare, feel the adrenaline rush in my veins, feel my heart pound like I was about to bench three hundred pounds. It was the same rush of anxiety I felt every time a patient flatlined.
I’d pictured this moment so many times over this last year, how I would respond if she ever reached out to me, and my reaction was always different, depending on how long it’d been since she left me.
I didn’t expect the reaction that hit me.
I was fucking pissed. Now you wanna talk? Over a year later? Is this a joke? I probably shouldn’t have texted her back at all, but once she’d dropped her line, I got hooked and couldn’t let go.
The dots didn’t pop up.
I continued to stare at the screen, wondering what she would say to that.
Clearly, she had nothing to say.
Now, I regretted my reaction, because I wanted to know what would drive her to text me after all this time, on a Tuesday night, completely at random. I almost texted her again, but I refused to. Ball was in her court.
You don’t owe me anything, Dex. But I’d really like to talk to you…
Why?
The dots stopped.
“Goddammit, why?” I screamed at the phone as if I were screaming at her.
Her message came a few moments later. Because I need to apologize to you.
There I sat, in an empty café, almost nine in the evening, with a cup of coffee in front of me that I hadn’t touched.
Felt rude not to buy something.
I had just as much adrenaline in my body now as I had in the apartment. I couldn’t believe I’d actually come, agreed to meet her on a whim, to look her in the eye, when I hadn’t seen her in the flesh in over a year.
Then she walked in.
Same long brown hair.
Same bright eyes.
She carried herself the same way, like she was in court, ready to win her case. It was easy for her to find me since I was literally the only person in there. Unlike me, she didn’t bother to buy anything before she walked over, wearing a thick gray pea coat and a dark blue scarf. Her movements slowed more and more as she approached me with apprehension.