Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79308 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 397(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79308 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 397(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
“So, am I fixed now?” I joked, making Imani chuckle.
“No, but thank you for sharing that with me. Every feeling you have is completely valid.”
“What do you think is wrong with me?”
“Nothing,” she replied. “Do you have some things to work through? Yes. But you’re not broken. Some of what you’ve explained is self-esteem related. There’s definitely some disordered eating, toxic diet and exercise culture, social factors impacting your relationship with food, and possibly some body dysmorphia. If you’d like to continue seeing me, I think we can tackle these things together.”
I did want that. I wanted it maybe more than I’d wanted anything in my life. “Let’s do it.”
Imani smiled. “Let’s do it.”
I walked out of the office with a smile on my face. I sent a group text to all my people, just saying: I did it. And then I went straight for the center and my man.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Spencer
“How you been, man?” Morgan asked when he arrived at the restaurant. Corbin was having lunch with Marcus today, so I took the opportunity to message Morgan and touch base. I’d been a bit of an absent friend since Corbin and I started dating. Not that Morgan wasn’t busy with his own life and boyfriend, but I missed hanging out with him more.
“Good. How about you?”
It had been a hectic few weeks. Corbin had weekly sessions with Imani, the day before having been his fourth. I’d gone with him once, something he and Imani had discussed when he told her I was looking for someone to talk to about the best ways to be supportive to him. It was a conflict of interest for Imani to see me without him, but it had been productive when the three of us spoke because we could sort things out with Corbin’s thoughts and Imani’s knowledge.
Apparently, Corbin was struggling with the thought that I would eventually get tired of him and leave him, something that would never happen. And there were also times when he felt I pushed too hard, or he worried he was letting me down if he skipped a meal or posted to social media. I couldn’t pretend that was easy to hear, but the last thing I’d ever want was to make Corbin feel bad, so knowing that helped me catch myself when I was about to do those things.
“Eh. It’s been better, but it’s been worse too. Things are hectic with my family back home, and we’re dealing with a PR nightmare at work. I need a vacation,” Morgan replied, and I frowned. We talked about his life, of course—work, men, day-to-day stuff, but I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t curious about his life back home and why he was so private about it.
“Anything you want to talk about?”
“Don’t you know me better than to ask that?” When I gave him a frustrated look, he added, “Family relationships are complicated…mine even worse because I left in the middle of the night and never returned home.” Morgan shrugged.
“Um…do I get anything more than that?”
He grinned. “You’re lucky you got that much. I’d rather talk about you. It feels like you have a lot going on. You and Corbin are doing well?”
“We are.” I couldn’t stop the stupid, cheesy, ridiculous smile from spreading across my face. My feelings for him were indescribable. I thought I’d been in love with DJ, and maybe I had, but it was still not even close to how I felt about Corbin. Nothing and no one could ever feel as good as him.
“I would say so, if that smile is any indication.”
“I’m not even embarrassed about it either. It feels different from any relationship I’ve had before. Like we’re on the same page, working toward something together.”
“I’m happy for ya, man,” Morgan said, his deep voice full of sincerity.
“Thank you.” We finally looked at our menus then, and when the waitress came over, we ordered.
“How’s work?” Morgan asked.
“Busy. Things are really kicking into high gear for the center’s annual gala in April. It’s our biggest event every year and brings in a lot of much needed money.”
“Is Corbin going with you?”
“Yeah. I had my plus-one, of course, but I worked my ass off to get tickets for his friends and their partners so last-minute. You know how these things are—the guest list is usually finalized in advance.” It was silly, but that made me proud. I wanted to get to know them better, wanted to be involved and wanted them involved in my life with Corbin, because I did want that—a life with him. “I’m bummed you and Rob can’t go.”
“I know, but I kinda need to limit my social events. I often find them overwhelming.”
I could understand that.
The waitress showed up with our food just as we finished our conversation about the gala. “I’d really love for you to meet Corbin. I don’t want this to be something we say and don’t make time to do.”