Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 57201 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 57201 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
“God, how stupid do you think I am? Will you just stop? You can’t rewrite the past, even if you want to. It’s time you man up.”
I pin her in with my body and back her up against the stall. “You think you have it all figured out in that pretty little head of yours, don’t you, Katie?” I ask, my voice cold and quiet as I place my hand at her neck, making her look directly at me. Her eyes go wide with shock. Before coming back, I’ve never held her like this. I had never been rough with her at all. Now, it seems to be the only way I can touch her. I don’t have it in me to be gentle now.
“Jake,” she gasps.
“I didn’t walk away from Lennon four years ago. I didn’t know about him. If I had, I would have been here!” I growl.
“Yeah, right. Tell me another one. Are you seriously trying to tell me that Jeff didn’t tell you about Lennon?”
“I’m not trying to tell you that, I am just plain saying it. He didn’t tell me shit until just before your wedding.”
“Bullshit.”
“It’s the truth,” I insist.
“Stop trying to convince me that Jeff didn’t tell you about Lennon. I won’t believe you.”
“Because Jeff wouldn’t lie to you, right? My big brother is a saint, right? It’s only me you don’t have faith in.” God, I sound bitter, but that’s the way I feel. I feel like every single person I loved here in Macon chose my brother over me.
How the hell do I deal with that?
“Why should I have faith in you, Jake? You left me alone, scared, and pregnant!”
“I didn’t know!” I growl. “I didn’t fucking know, Katie. You didn’t tell me!”
“Would it have changed anything?” she asks. I let go of her and step back.
“God, Katie, I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
“Then, we’re right back where we started. I know you’re angry with me and I should have been the one to tell you about Lennon. I know that. I feel guilty every single day about it, but damn it, Jake… I was scared. You barely looked at me when you came in. When you said anything to me at all, it was delivered by a stranger and not the boy I gave my heart to. I was dealing with so much that I just didn’t have the courage.”
“The Katie I loved was full of grit. She would have stood up to anyone and anything.”
“That Katie crumpled when you walked out and left me a note that cut out my heart. I was a complete mess after I read your letter, Jake. You may not like it, but if your brother hadn’t held me up back then, I’m not sure I would have made it. That’s why I have faith in what he tells me. That’s why I know he told you about Lennon. Besides, what reason would he have to lie about something like that? It doesn’t make sense.”
“Oh, gee. I don’t know. How about the fact that if he didn’t tell me, I wouldn’t come back and demand my rightful place in Lennon’s life or yours for that matter? Did you think of that, Katie? All Jeff has ever wanted is you. That’s it. This way he got both of you.”
“That’s not what happened. There’s no way Jeff would keep Lennon a secret from you after promising me he would confront you—absolutely no way.”
“What makes you so certain?”
“Because he knew there was no future in it. That’s why. The two of us had broken up. He wanted more than I could give him. I broke up with him and told him to find someone who could love him the way he needed. There was no future in him thinking it would keep me by his side.”
“And yet, you were the woman getting ready to marry him not so long ago, right? Ain’t that some funny shit right there.”
“Stop! We stayed apart for almost two years. You knew that.”
“I did. Then, suddenly he’s back and you two are as thick as thieves. What happened? You decided you couldn’t live without him after all? Or were you just waiting to see which brother would step up and do whatever you wanted this time?”
I see her draw her hand back, but I don’t try to stop her. Her hand slams against the side of my face, connecting and setting my skin on fire. I grab her by the wrist and yank her hand away.
“I wouldn’t try that again,” I warn.
“I hate you. It’s so easy for you to sit there and judge me. You don’t know me, Jake. Don’t pretend you do. I’m not the same person. I love your brother. I broke up with him so he could find someone whole, someone who didn’t have a piece of her heart ripped out and missing. Someone who didn’t have feelings for his brother that never seemed to go away. He wanted more. He wanted in my bed and here it was three years later, and I couldn’t give that to him. Is that what you want to hear, you bastard!” she screams.