Total pages in book: 57
Estimated words: 54630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 273(@200wpm)___ 219(@250wpm)___ 182(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 54630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 273(@200wpm)___ 219(@250wpm)___ 182(@300wpm)
He forced himself to look at her, and the unshed tears glistening in her eyes made him feel violent. If someone could guarantee to Rathe that taking another life would give him the power to change his destiny with Mary, he would probably find someone to murder in a heartbeat. At that moment, he just wanted to unleash the rage inside him, wanted to smash the hell out of something because he was tired of wanting someone forbidden to him.
“I’m sorry.” The words were torn out of him.
Mary shook her head wildly. Somehow, she felt like his apology made everything worse, made her presence in his life something to regret. “D-don’t be.”
A harsh laugh escaped him. “You’re too nice for me.”
“I’m n-not.”
“Yes, you are.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Do you know how bloody foolish I was tonight?”
He turned to her, and the look of self-disgust on his handsome face made Mary’s heart ache.
“I went to my parents’ place, hoping they’d weave for me a goddamn fairy tale – anything to prove that the bloody contract isn’t only something an arsehole could do. But you saw what happened. He couldn’t explain why he had Mother sign those papers.”
His jaw clenched. “He couldn’t say anything because the damn truth is, he really was an arsehole—-”
Unable to bear the torment etched on Rathe’s face, she took hold of his hand, saying urgently, “We c-can’t be sure—-”
“He didn’t say anything!” Rathe was close to shouting. “And do you know what that means? Do you? My entire childhood, people treated my mother like trash and she never made a fuss. I always thought it was because they were taking the high road, but it’s not. It was because it’s true. My father is an arsehole who seduced my mom when she was too young to know what’s right—-” His voice fell.
A second later, Rathe took hold of her by the shoulders, his grip so tight it made her cry out. “Just like you are now. Just like you’re too young to know—-”
“No.” She finally saw where this was heading, and she shook her head wildly. “NO.” She wrenched out of his hold so she could straddle him and cup his face. If she wasn’t feeling too anxious, she would have laughed at the surprise that flitted in Rathe’s eyes at her sudden actions. It really wasn’t like her to be this assertive, but what else could she do when he was about to tell her that what they had was wrong?
“L-look at me,” she demanded. When he did, she asked fiercely, “Do I look stupid to you?”
He frowned. “No. Of course not, but—-”
“I’m n-not yet done.” Her still-fierce tone silenced him, his intense gaze never leaving her face.
Her fists curling against his shirt, Mary asked him haltingly, “If you d-don’t think I’m stupid, then you should trust me to know if I really love someone or not. If you don’t think I’m stupid, shouldn’t you just believe that I love you?”
Tears choked her voice as she asked, “If you don’t think I’m stupid, shouldn’t y-you keep b-believing that I can make you love...me?”
A wealth of insecurities lied in her question, and he remembered the last time he had made her feel this way.
Mary was in her dorm, shaking and injured, her stepfather’s corpse on the floor. She was pale from shock and loss of blood, but more than that, she gazed at him like she was seeing the world without her rose-colored glasses for the very first time.
“My piranha’s not a vegetarian...”
The words sounded like a joke, but Rathe knew they were anything but, knew it was his little pearl’s way of coping with the fact that her stepfather had tried to rape her and her pet piranha had come to her rescue.
After calling 911, Rathe approached her with care. She looked so lost it made him feel so bloody helpless.
“Mary?” He didn’t dare say anything else, feeling like if he said the wrong thing, she would break down completely.
Hearing her name on his lips seemed to make something in Mary snap, and her next words proved it.
“And I’m not your mistress, am I?”
Rathe’s heart broke at the words, and his heart broke another time at seeing the pain in her eyes. This was girl who had loved him so selflessly despite the fact that he had been a bastard to her so many bloody times.
She had only loved him, and all he had been able to do was hurt her.
In front of him, Mary’s eyes began to swim with tears.
“I’m your whore, right?”
He remembered how she looked that time when Mary called herself his whore. It was exactly how she looked now.
His chest spasmed, and he hauled her down to him. “I’m sorry.”
Mary started to cry even as their lips meshed with each other. This time, she welcomed the apology. Not because she wanted to hear it, but because this time it didn’t feel like he was also saying goodbye.