Total pages in book: 35
Estimated words: 33589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 168(@200wpm)___ 134(@250wpm)___ 112(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 33589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 168(@200wpm)___ 134(@250wpm)___ 112(@300wpm)
Lauren has lost several shades of color by this point. Her eyes are wide and fixed on him the way one might look at a tornado that touched down too close to them. No chance of escape even if they try to flee, so might as well take in its devastating beauty while they can.
Like most bullies, she was ill-prepared to be confronted. Ill-prepared to face my husband’s practiced calm as he leveled her with such devastating truths.
Her mouth eventually opens, of course, but Joey grabs her arm before she can speak.
“Don’t,” he says firmly, his voice resentful. “He’s serious.”
Marcus straightens and turns, shifting his attention to Joey. “And you, little brother. I wasn’t done with you. Clearly, you weren’t done with me, either, but why don’t we put this to bed right now? She married me, not you. I understand that’s a tough pill to swallow, but have you forgotten your part in all that? In your desperate attempt to paint yourself a victim, have you forgotten you were the one who cheated on her? What was done to her that night, I did to her. I was in control. That can’t be hard for you to believe. If you want to be angry at someone, be angry at me. But don’t let your bitterness compel you to date people you don’t even like because they are her opposite. It isn’t fun for any of us, but especially not for you. And if the company of the embittered woman you brought here tonight is what comforts you right now, that’s a pretty good indication of the way you’re framing all this. Misery loves company, doesn’t it? For your own good, you need to stop dwelling on it. Jessa’s mine now. She’s mine forever. We’re married, we’re having a baby. Move on. Find someone else whose company you enjoy and then show her you feel that way about her. Don’t treat her the way you treated Jess so you can keep this one.”
Joey nods, his bitterness tugging at his mouth. “Unless you like her too, huh?”
Marcus levels his brother an unamused look. “There is no other woman alive who holds the least bit of interest to me. That’s the difference between us. When I find what I’ve been searching for, I stop looking. You could put a condom in my hand and a naked stripper right here on the dining table, and do you know what would happen? Nothing. I cannot be compelled to cheat on a woman I love, and neither could you. If you’re telling yourself a different story after the fact to avoid accountability, then that’s your problem. But it isn’t the truth, and the self-deception is not doing you any favors.”
Joey nods, but I can see he still isn’t ready to absorb Marcus’ words. “Since the truth is so goddamn important to you now, have you ever told Jessa who introduced me to Kelly?” Glancing past his brother, he looks down at me. “That’s the first woman I cheated on you with.”
“It’s ancient history,” Marcus states coolly.
“Is it?” Joey frowns. “Did you tell her how you talked Kelly up to me? How, once I took the bait, you planted the idea that Jess never had to find out, that it was just a night of harmless fun, blowing off steam—”
“That’s enough, Joey.”
“And for that matter,” he says, frowning theatrically like he’s trying to remember something. “Who was my best man? Who planned my bachelor party? Who hired that fucking stripper, Marcus?”
“I said, enough,” Marcus says sharply, glaring at his younger brother.
Joey glares back up at him, shaking his head. “Who put the idea in my head? ‘Last night as a single man, might as well enjoy it.’ Isn’t that what you said? Who put the condom in my fucking hand, Marcus?”
“He said that’s enough.”
Surprised gazes turn in my direction as I speak up. All but my ex-fiancé and my husband. They’re still glaring at each other.
“It’s enough, Joey,” I say more gently. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
Joey nods, but with acceptance of his defeat this round, not with true acceptance.
I hope someday it will be.
I’d like to give him a hug, to tell him I’m sorry for any pain I’ve caused, but I know Marcus won’t let me. Joey won’t apologize for the pain he caused me, and my husband won’t allow me to bend over backward for someone who doesn’t show me any respect, even if I feel an apology might be warranted. It doesn’t make me feel bad to apologize to people if I’ve done wrong. It doesn’t make me feel bad to move on and let things go when that’s the best path forward.
Marcus is right that I’m forgiving.
But I’d rather be that than what Joey is right now. Bitter and angry, holding onto old grudges that have no possible resolution over situations that panned out the way they were truly meant to.