Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 138274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
As a fresh wave of tears came, it was nice timing on the mop-up. “I know.”
She lost it then, really lost it. Pressing the napkin into her eyes, she just let go because she didn’t have a choice—and when the wave passed, and she finally lowered her hands from her face, her mahmen was right there. Still.
Always.
“Can you tell me what brought this on?” came the gentle prompt.
Nalla got herself another blotter. “I… spent the day with Nate, and he woke up from a dream—a nightmare, but he was still in it. He looked at me and didn’t see me. He was back… in a lab somewhere. They were hurting him—and his voice was that of a young. Oh, mahmen, it was awful.”
Bella’s eyes closed and she shook her head. “I had heard about his rescue. Murhder and Sarah got him out of there. It was right before his transition. If they hadn’t gotten there in time, he most certainly would have died.”
“He said that his mahmen was killed there?”
“Well, as I understand, she escaped and died much later of complications. But the humans killed her for sure. Nate and his adoptive parents have kept it all kind of private—and I know he’s struggled. I can’t say I’m surprised his sleep is disturbed.”
“I was trying to wake him, but I couldn’t get through to him. And then he ended up cowering in a corner… he didn’t recognize me. At all.” She glanced over at the bread dough. “You helped, though.”
“I did?”
“I remembered when I’d wake up, in the middle of the day to hear Father shouting in his sleep. And then I’d hear you clap, twice.”
Bella nodded gravely. “Yes, that’s what’s worked for me. If I want to get him out of it. Must be something about the sound forcing the brain to focus on the present.”
“You really, truly helped me.”
“Good, I’m glad. And I’m glad you were there for Nate.” Bella looked around the kitchen, as if she were picturing people in it, her eyes lingering in different places. But given her grave expression, she wasn’t actually seeing anything of the tidy white cupboards and the butcher-block counters. “As for your father and me, when it comes to his past, we really didn’t want you to see behind his curtain, as he calls it. He’s worked so hard on himself, and now, for a lot of nights and days, what was done to him is really not forefront in his mind. Others, though? It comes back. When I think about where he and I started? He’s a different male. But it’s always going to be there, lurking.”
Nalla nodded. “Yes.”
“And he never wanted you to see him as anything other than your father. He didn’t want you to feel like you had to take care of him, or worry that he couldn’t protect us.”
“I never thought that.”
“Good. Because he’s always there for the people he loves, his Brothers… the King and Beth and L.W. Your father is a male of worth, and I try not to get in the middle of you two, but he loves you, he really does. And this distance is just killing him.”
Well, didn’t that bring a fresh wave of the weepies on, so there was some more sniffing and patting on Nalla’s part, her eyes burning, her throat raw. Yet there was an easiness between her and her mahmen that had never existed before.
Then again, they had something in common. They both loved survivors, which was a special kind of bond with someone else.
The mutual respect was also something that happened when you started to see a parent as a person, with a life that started before you, and would continue after you left the house to make your own home. When they were only your mahmen, they owed you everything. When they were more than that, you recognized you were an important part of a larger whole for them.
“So you must be pretty serious with Nate?” Bella asked.
“It’s happening fast. And yet it feels so right.”
“Bonding can be like that. And you know, from personal experience, I can tell you that love makes a difference in people like your father and Nate. Be careful, though. Sometimes the damage does go too deep—and I’m not saying this out of disapproval or judgment. It’s just because I love you. With your father and me, it worked out. I wasn’t consumed by his pain, even though you’re right, it is a big part of my life and always will be. You have to also take care of yourself, though. Sometimes, what is damaged is ruined, and there’s no going back from that.”
Even a night ago, the tender words would have been a red cape to rush at.
Not anymore.
Nalla nodded again. “I understand.”
“Do you love him?”
She had to smile. “Are we doing Moonstruck here?”