Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 95816 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 479(@200wpm)___ 383(@250wpm)___ 319(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95816 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 479(@200wpm)___ 383(@250wpm)___ 319(@300wpm)
Neither of us spoke for a moment. I looked at her, studying her lovely face. Gracie was right—she looked tired and sad. Her brilliant blue eyes were shadowed. I met her gaze and looked away, studying my reflection in the glass. I looked much the same.
I drew in a deep breath and set down the glass of wine. I spoke slowly.
“First off, I need you to know I have never and will never cheat on you, Katy. You are my entire world. I build everything around you and our family. I have to know that you understand that.”
“I do,” she replied. “She and Gracie looked so close in age, the question was out before I could stop myself. I don’t even know why I asked. As soon as she threw out her accusation, I knew who her mother was. I was—” she swallowed “—I was just reacting, I suppose.”
Our eyes locked again, and she shrugged. “Old insecurities, I guess,” she added in a whisper.
I took her hand. “You shouldn’t have any—not when it comes to me. I love you more than I can express. More than I can show you in this lifetime. Even after all these years, all I see is you.”
“I know,” she replied. “It was all such…” Her voice trailed off.
“A shock, I know,” I finished.
She nodded and took a sip of her wine. I noticed her hand trembled, and the one I held in mine was cold—both signs of her inner turmoil.
“Katy, I can’t change the past. I thought I’d moved far enough away from it that the man I was would never touch my children’s lives or hurt you again. But it has, and if this plays out the way I think it will, it’s going to hurt us all for a while.” I paused, swallowing. “I hate that, but I’m aware my apologies won’t change anything.” I lifted her hand to my mouth, kissing the skin and holding it to my face.
“But I need you beside me on this. To know that, no matter what, you still love me and you’ll help me when I have to tell our kids. That you’ll accept this as best you can and not hate me for it.”
Her fingers pressed into my cheek, and I looked at her.
“I could never hate you, Richard. I love you. I will always love you.”
“I’m sorry for my words earlier. I didn’t mean them. I know why you married me.” I huffed out a humorless laugh. “It wasn’t as if I gave you much choice in the matter.”
“That started off pretty rocky, but look how well it turned out,” she said.
“It’s the best thing I ever did. Hands down.”
She smiled, shaky and fast, but it was a smile.
“Ashley is really angry right now. I think once we have the test done, it’s going to take a long time to heal. I don’t even know if we can salvage a relationship. If she wants one.”
“What do you want?”
“I don’t know, sweetheart. I can’t imagine knowing she is out there and not having some sort of contact. If she is mine, I want that—I think.” I dropped her hand and scrubbed my face, tugging on my tight neck muscles. “She might not want that. She is convinced I knew about her, and she might never get past that.” I shook my head. “She might have some sort of connection with her half-siblings and not me.”
“I’m sure once she gets to know you, she will. You will have to be patient, Richard. With her, with our kids. This is going to come as a huge shock to all of them. We will all need time to adjust and figure out the future.”
“Always so wise, my Katy,” I said with a smile, tracing her cheek.
She tried to smile, but I saw the tremor in her lips. “What? Say it, sweetheart. We need to be open and honest—especially now.”
“I keep thinking about something. I know it sounds crazy, but it–it hit me that Juliet had taken away the one thing I thought I’d given you that no one else had. That no one else would.”
“What are you talking about?”
“If Ashley is yours, then she is your firstborn. I thought I was the only woman to have given you children. I think that threw me a little.”
I shook my head, aghast. “No, sweetheart. No. Ashley might be my daughter, and I might be her father, but you made me a daddy. There’s a huge difference. Your place, your gift, is still number one. It always will be. Tell me you know that.”
She nodded, but I saw her worry. I fell to my knees at her feet, staring up at her. “I’m worried about how my kids will look at me. How you feel about me. I can take a lot, sweetheart, but losing your love, your sweetness, would end me. If our kids are angry with me and I don’t have your strength, I don’t know how I’ll cope. If my past makes me lose this life that I love so much, I don’t know how I’ll handle it.”