Total pages in book: 142
Estimated words: 133849 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 669(@200wpm)___ 535(@250wpm)___ 446(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 133849 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 669(@200wpm)___ 535(@250wpm)___ 446(@300wpm)
His best friend was smart, but he’d misread her. “She’s asking why we need this.”
Josh frowned. “Is that what you’re asking?”
“Yes, Sir. Thank you for translating, Grim,” she said, and he could hear the smile in her tone.
It was the sweet way she said the words that made his heart ease. She was curious. She wasn’t judging. “For one thing, you’ve given us one of the most important things about this lifestyle. Dominance and submission can help facilitate communication between partners. It can seem weird to talk about sex, but it’s important. As to your question, I think we have two different answers. Josh was born this way, and I was made.”
“Well, if we’re having this discussion, you can look up.” Josh got to one knee in front of her, and it was obvious while he was slightly irritated—because he was horny as hell—he was going to take the time to explain. “I don’t know why I’m like this. Maybe because I was raised in a D/s household. My father is the Dom and my pops and Mom are his subs. This is how they live. I assure you neither Pops or Mom would tell you they feel like they’re under Dad’s thumb. He’s what we call an indulgent top. It’s a lifestyle to other people, but to me it’s my life. It makes sense to me. So when Grim and I first started having sex, our dad took us to a club and we spent time training. We learned about sex and pleasure and more importantly, consent and how to protect and take care of the women who bottom for us.”
“My stepmom told me if I got pregnant, I was on my own. She said the only way to stay safe was to keep my legs shut,” Nicole said with a wry twist of her lips. “The Internet was my best sex ed teacher. I think your parents did a better job. Until last night, I would have told you sex is just a way to get close to a man.”
Josh nodded. “Your sexuality is a part of you, and a part you shouldn’t feel ashamed of or deny. It’s a gift, and there’s nothing wrong with indulging your needs. You don’t seem to mind being naked right now.”
“I’m as surprised as you are,” she admitted. “It feels nice because I’m not worried you’re going to use it against me.”
“How would we use it against you?” Grim asked, not liking the fact that it felt like she knew people who would.
“You could tell me how fat I am,” she explained quietly. “Or I’m too skinny. I…was married once. We’re divorced now. To say he was mean to me would be an understatement. I was young, and I didn’t look for red flags. I didn’t even love him. I liked him, and I wanted to start my life. He was good at love bombing me, and I hadn’t had enough affection from my parents. I fall for a love bomb every time.”
Grim had heard the term and hated how she was having to use it. “No love bombs from us. How we treat you won’t change. We’ll put you first.”
She turned her head slightly. “I believe you. I know I shouldn’t. It’s too soon, but I’m following my instincts this time. The truth of the matter is I knew there was something wrong with my ex, but I loved the attention and I wanted to be wrong. So I’m trusting myself this time. As much as I’m trusting you. It feels good to, if that makes sense.”
“It does,” Josh replied. “And that’s what I do. My instincts tell me to take control during sex. During a lot of things, to be honest, but I don’t need as much control as my dad has. Grim doesn’t need to submit the way my pops does. Pops is even more submissive than my mom. Grim needs something different.”
“I need the control because for most of my life I had none,” Grim explained. “My mother married a man who can only be described as abusive and manipulative when I was very young. He pulled me out of a school I loved, and for a long time I was stuck in what seemed like prison to me. There were times he beat me so badly I didn’t think I was going to make it, and he convinced me for a while that I deserved it. I cling to discipline because I think it fights the chaos of my youth in a way. The lifestyle also taught me how to have a healthy relationship with sex. But, I can play this another way if you need me to.”
Her nose wrinkled. “I’m enjoying this. I just wanted to know. Maybe if I know why it works for you two, I can understand myself better. I do tend to fall for attention, and I haven’t had any in a long time. But I don’t think you’re trying to maneuver me into a position where you can abuse me. You should know I don’t take that crap anymore. I’m not the same person I was at nineteen.”