Total pages in book: 68
Estimated words: 64887 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 324(@200wpm)___ 260(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64887 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 324(@200wpm)___ 260(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
“Absolutely.”
“Phew. I was worried you’d say I’m moving too slowly for you.”
I shrug. “If I’m being honest, I think things will happen more quickly than you’re anticipating. Just a hunch. But I promise I’ll never pressure you. Like I said, this is your house, your rules.”
“Thank you so much.”
“I do have one question, though, before we leave this topic. Just to be clear, is your answer no to marrying me? You never gave me an answer.”
Selena snorts. But then, she says something surprising. “I wouldn’t say my answer is no. It’s more like ‘Patience, Grayson-hopper. We’re not there yet.’”
I can’t believe my ears. I lean my forearms onto the kitchen table, brimming with optimism and excitement. “Well, in that case, I’ve got a proposed amendment to the plan you’ve laid out. I promise I won’t think about the future, as you’ve requested—except for when I’m periodically asking you to marry me, at which point we’ll both agree I’m allowed to momentarily indulge my romanticism, ever so briefly, and think about the future I’m dying to have with you.”
Selena tilts her head. “What, exactly, do you mean by ‘periodically’?”
I shrug. “Once a week?”
Selena scoffs. “That’d be insane. No. That’s way too often, Grayson.”
“Not when I’d want to ask you twice a day. And we’d still be doing things your way, all other days of the week. All I’m asking is you give me a tiny window each week to swing for the fences.”
She shakes her head. “It’s too often for me, but also for you. I can’t let you do that to yourself, honey. I’m not going to change my mind, from one week to the next. Which means you’ll start feeling like you’re banging your head against a brick wall. You’ll feel hurt and rejected, instead of energized and optimistic. What would be the point in that?”
“I won’t feel rejected, if I propose to you the same way I just did. That was fun, wasn’t it?”
“It was,” she concedes.
“So, I’ll ask you like that, once a week. I’ll keep it casual. No pressure. I’ll do it at the breakfast table, just like today. Or maybe I’ll do it at night in bed, just to keep you guessing. The point is there’ll be no grand gestures. No tension. It’ll always be nothing but light-hearted and fun—my way of letting you know my feelings and dreams haven’t changed. God willing, you’ll reply with ‘Patience, Grayson-hopper, we’re not there yet,’ and I’ll know you’re not saying ‘no’ or ‘never.’ That will be enough hope to keep me feeling optimistic.” I grin. “Hope is sunshine, soil, and water to a little seedling like me, Hot Teacher.”
Selena looks surprisingly serious. She processes my speech for a long moment, before finally surprising me with, “Once a month. That’s my final offer.”
I can’t believe it. She’s actually agreeing to this lunacy? Quickly, before she can take it back, I say “deal” and take her hand.
“And if it stops being fun for you,” she says, shaking my hand. “If you realize your feelings have started to get hurt, promise me you’ll stop doing it.”
I kiss the top of her hand and release it. “Not likely, but okay. I promise.”
“Good.”
I swallow hard, unsure if I should say the thing on the tip of my tongue. Finally, I decide to go for it. “On the flipside, if one day you realize you’re actually ready to say yes to me the next time I propose, could you please let me know that? Not with explicit words, necessarily. I’m not asking you to propose to me. But maybe you could give me some kind of heads-up or smoke signal to let me know you’ve had that epiphany? That way, I’ll know to make my next proposal a proper one with all the bells and whistles.”
Selena does that thing where she looks at me like I’m adorably naïve. But, come on, none of this should surprise her. From our first meeting at Captain’s, she knew I’d fall hard and fast for her. She said so herself. Well, here I am: more in love with her than I ever thought possible.
“And what if I’ve realized I love you with all my heart and want you to live here with me as my partner but not as my husband?” she asks. “What if I realize I don’t want to get married again to anyone, not even to you? If I have that realization, I’m going to have to tell you that, too, Grayson.”
“Well, fuck yeah, you’d better tell me that, or else I’m going to cluelessly keep asking my girlfriend to marry me till I’m one-hundred-and-three.”
Selena chuckles. “You’re a very silly man, Grayson McKnight.”
“Honestly, if you said that to me, if you said you’re not willing to get married again, I’d be okay with that, as long as you still wanted me. I’ve never believed marriage is a requirement for a happy life. As long as I’ve got you, I’ll always be happy. You’re all I need, forever.”