Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 46838 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 234(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 46838 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 234(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
“I never wanted to embarrass you,” I say.
He scoffs. I wonder if he’s been drinking. “You know what they did?”
“Who’s they?” I ask.
“My Cartel friends.”
The emphasis is enough to tell me I’m right. His status has fallen in the Cartel.
“They’d bet on you every single time. They knew you wouldn’t throw the fights. They’d brag about it to me – how betting on you, against me made them more and more money each time.”
“Hurting me won’t change any of that.”
It’s a struggle not to shout at this man, to roar at him that this is the pettiest stuff I’ve ever heard.
But certain men can’t help but fixate on things, laser in on moments that made them feel small, and think if they correct those particular moments, their lives will somehow be better.
Like the boxer who lost the big fight and relives it in the bottom of a bottle every night, I’ve met a few of them in my time.
“Maybe you’re right,” Emil whispers. “But it’ll make me feel a hell of a lot better.”
He hangs up, and I see a notification on my screen… with a text from Mia.
She messaged me while I was on the phone.
Thank you. I’ll call you if I need to. And I haven’t forgotten what you said about me admitting something over text.
My heart hammers so hard as I read her words, my body aching like there’s an animal in me attempting to break free.
I know what she’s hinting at, the first I mentioned.
First orgasm, first kiss, and first….
If I’m right, I know there’s no turning back.
If no other man has ever touched my woman, it will mean she belongs to me with even more certainty, if that’s possible.
It will mean not only has no other man ever touched her, but no other man gets to touch her.
She belongs to me, just me.
Is there something you want to tell me? I text.
Emil could be outside her apartment right now.
But the address he left me only had the street number, not her specific apartment.
He didn’t follow her inside. So he doesn’t know which door to bash in.
Yet.
My mind’s flaring all over the place.
The closer I get to discovering how much she means to me, the fiercer my need to protect her becomes.
I feel like there’s a lot I need to share after you shared so much. About my Dad. About my past. About everything. But I know what you’re hinting at… it could change the way you see me.
It won’t, I reply. Or, if it does, not in a bad way.
CHAPTER 14
Mia
It’s so much easier in my bedroom with my knees pulled to my chest and my phone clasped tightly in my hands. It brings me a sense of security, being able to communicate through the digital world.
I don’t have to think about how close he came to mauling me.
He was on edge in the car, and I was too stunned or, let’s face it, too inexperienced in responding correctly.
A different woman would’ve known all the best ways to tame her man.
But with the newness of it all….
Now, my thumb moves over the letters, one by one. I could be signing away any chance I have at him wanting me.
But it seems like he’s already guessed.
V, I type. I-R-G-I-N.
I stare at the word. Virgin.
That’s me, and not just with sex. I’d never kissed, touched, or done anything before Killian entered my life.
I send the message quickly, telling him I’m a virgin.
All the while, I’m listening out for sounds from the next room, from Mom, who might need my help. Or possibly noise from the hallway beyond, where Emil might be lurking, wanting warped revenge because my man wouldn’t break the law.
Killian doesn’t respond.
Minutes pass.
Still no response.
I know I could talk to myself and explain that there’s no need to freak out. But anxiety is like a hamster wheel sometimes, with a hamster running on it who’s all hopped up on stimulants and never stops once he gets going.
My heart thuds as I pace the room.
How long can a person pace?
Well, I spend a long time walking back and forth.
Ten minutes – I check the time from when I sent the text.
Why isn’t he responding?
Maybe I misread the entire situation, and now he wants nothing to do with me. He wanted something in exchange for him helping me against this Emil person….
If he even exists.
No, he does. I trust Killian, even if I probably shouldn’t trust a savage, experienced, tatted stranger.
It’s like somebody else takes me over as I grab my phone, texting quickly, wanting him to understand the nuances of the situation, not just the whole of it.
My dad suffered from a mental illness for as long as I can remember, but he was able to hide it from the world, mostly… He held a job as an electrician and presented a good face to the world. Mom and I were made to pose for photos and, when I was younger, to go out into the community from time to time, pretending we were normal.