Total pages in book: 48
Estimated words: 43827 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43827 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
When I’d overheard momma and daddy talking about his plans to settle down and start a family, I thought I would die from the pain. Up until that point I had still allowed myself to daydream about the two of us professing our undying love for each other one day. I’d weaved so many dreams around the two of us over the years that sometimes it was hard to separate dream from reality.
With the news of his impending nuptials, that had all gone up in smoke and I was left with nothing but seven years of unfulfilled dreams. I hated him for doing this to me, for causing me to make a decision that had ended in disaster. And the worst of it was not just that he was getting married, but just who it was that he was planning to spend the rest of his life with. Asshole!
It wasn’t fair that I should lose in love not once but twice. Granted I wasn’t in love with Joel, neither was he with me, but couldn’t he have kept it zipped until after the honeymoon? I’d been willing to overlook even that after a decent amount of time had passed. It was worth it, at least it was in my mind back then, as long as I had the cover of marriage to a respectable man to shield me from my own private hurt when the man I was really in love with hitched his wagon to someone else’s.
Now it was all screwed up and I got egg on my face in the bargain. I could either lick my wounds and keep on taking these hits as they came, or I could take a stand and decide not to take the shit that life threw at me any more.
I looked over at the twelve-gauge shotgun my daddy had given me for my sixteenth birthday. You see, along with being taught how to be a lady, my daddy had taught me how to shoot the balls off any motherfucker that dared mess with Brady Sutherland’s little girl. Maybe I shouldn’t just stop with Joel and his sidepiece, maybe I ought a keep going and put an end to my misery once and for all. One of those ‘if I can’t have you no one else can’ type things. But how would mama and daddy ever show their faces in public again?
I saw the turnoff up ahead and geared myself up for what was to come. This wasn’t because that idiot Joel had cheated on me and had the bad taste to get caught. It wasn’t even because I knew the little titmouse librarian had done it on purpose to get back at me for being perfect. No, this was because all my plans to be married before my unrequited love interest had been thwarted.
I wanted to be Mrs. Joel Campton by the weekend, because even though his family was cash poor, their name was almost as exalted as mine. The woman my…what the hell did you call the man you’ve been secretly in love with since your teens anyway? Anyway the woman he who shall remain nameless was rumored to be walking down the aisle was of no account.
Her family was not on the same level as mine, but that was no reason to hate her. No I hated her because she had something I wanted, something that can never be mine. He was the only thing in my life that I had failed at. It was only when he was involved that all my teachings went out the window. On top of that I was sure that she’d purposely gone after him because she knew I was in love with him.
Granted the one and only time I’d told her that we were both sixteen, and that was a few weeks before mama forbid me to ever even speak to her again on account of she was the one who had turned me from a sweet little thing into something not even my granddaddy would recognize.
The thought that she was even sharing his bed was enough to put me in a mental institution. No wonder rumors of their impending nuptials had sent me over the edge and caused me to be in the predicament I now found myself in.
It was only when it came to him that I lost all sense of self and made a fool of myself. I can just see him now shaking his head in that way of his when word of my latest shame reached his ears. He’d probably just say ‘poor thing, better luck next time.’ It just burned my ass to think of the smug condescending ass thinking it much less saying it.
I took the corner off the highway on two wheels doing ninety, with my anger refueled by my thoughts. I hope sheriff Carson wasn’t anywhere around, him or any of his mealy mouthed deputies. I wasn’t in the mood for any niceties and I’m in just the right frame of mind to shoot anyone who tries to get in my way.