Total pages in book: 135
Estimated words: 126098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 630(@200wpm)___ 504(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 126098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 630(@200wpm)___ 504(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
Abby took a sip of her tea. "What do I need?" she finally asked.
"You need to get over your inhibitions about your body. Of which there are many, but the one we're concerning ourselves with right now is anal."
"I don't have inhibitions about my body," she protested. Mark merely raised an eyebrow at her. "Moving on," she said. "How do we do that, give me what I need?"
"You give me you."
She frowned. "I did."
He shook his head. "I mean completely. It's called consensual non-consent. You give me your one-time consent to do anything to you. Anything I want. Total control. Anything you say after that initial 'yes', whether it's 'no' or 'stop' or 'cantaloupe' doesn't matter and will be ignored at my discretion."
Abby drew in a breath. "Mark."
"I will not harm you, Abby. There won't even be much pain. Not physical anyway. What you went through tonight was far and away worse than what I will do to you if you agree. Trust that. The issues will be mostly mental. And you will say ‘no’, Abby. You will ask me to stop. You will beg me to stop. But I will not. And in the end, you'll be better for it. If you can trust me."
"What- what will you do?"
He gave her a look. "You know better than to ask, don't you?"
"You said you don't want that. Total control. You said that's not-"
"I don't want it. Not forever. This will be for one weekend and one weekend only. We both have jobs, Abby. Lives. I'm not going to lock you in a cage in my basement for the next twenty years. It's one weekend. Starting Friday night and I will release you Sunday afternoon. If you never want to come back to me, I will understand. But I'm telling you, you will, Abby. You will be better for this. I can teach you to give yourself to me, to pleasure, and pain, and you will come to love it."
"You said no pain," she countered quickly.
"I said some pain. There will be some pain in the training. A small amount. Not the end of the world. Nothing you can't very easily handle. Like I said, your problem is psychological. And I can break you of that. But you have to trust me that I can."
"Break me," she whispered as a shiver ran down her spine.
"Yes, Abby. I will break you down. Totally. And then I will build you back up, better than you were before."
"And you can do whatever you want."
"Anything. You and your body belong totally to me. You will obey every command I give you or there will be punishment. That includes, especially, answering every question I ask you honestly and to the best of your ability. Punishments are not part of the training, Abby. I hope not to have to use them, but if I do, they will be unpleasant. Immensely. The training will feel like a walk in the park by comparison. The only promise I will make to you is that your needs always come first."
"I- I need to think about it."
He nodded. "It means a lot to me that you'll consider it. I'll give you this week to think it over. Like I said, we'll need all weekend." He leaned forward and took the play collar off the table and handed it to her. "If you decide to do this, come to me Friday night, 8 o'clock. Shaved the way I like you. Wearing this. The door won't open again until Sunday at 5. If you don't want to do this, or you can't, we'll just have to slow things way down until you can trust me."
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Friday afternoon Abby tried to concentrate at work and it worked for long stretches, but every thing reminded her of Mark and if this week was any indication of 'slowing down' she didn't want any part of it. It was strictly radio silence for Mark while she was mulling over his request.
Life with Mark could be scary, could be exhilarating, always exciting. Life without Mark was....fucking boring. He'd promised no pain. No, scratch that. Little pain. If she submitted. Possibly big time pain if she disobeyed. But she needed it. So he said. Was he right? She tapped her pen against her desk.
What had he been right about so far? She wasn't afraid of pain. Didn't even mind a little bit of it during sex. She wasn't against BDSM because it objectified women. She was afraid of what would happen if she liked it. She wanted to give up control, to be allowed to feel and enjoy without being constantly worried about her performance. She loved the ball gag, despite all her initial fears and opinions of it. She liked the bondage. So far he’d been right about everything.