Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 43837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
“Kathleen Henderson?” My mother’s nurse says, squinting. “Is that you?”
“Hello, Nurse Shirley,” I acknowledge, nodding. “It’s good to see you again.”
She’s beady-eyed, and her creamy white shoes squeak on the floor under her.
“Goodness, I had no idea you worked here, Ms. Henderson,” she says brightly, and though she doesn’t sound patronizing, I can’t help but feel her judgment. “This must be why you’re so busy all of the time. My, that makes a lot of sense. ”
“Busy?” I question her, looking around for anyone to save me from this interaction. The familiar nurse must have just gotten off her shift, and I wonder if she lives close by or not. I would assume not since the nursing home is about a twenty-minute drive from here and the traffic on the interstate is always horrible.
“Oh yes, I just assumed your life must be very hectic,” Shirley explains as she takes a sip of her coffee. “You haven’t been by to see your mother in weeks. So busy.”
“Oh right,” I answer her dully, nodding though I feel almost numb. There’s a sudden lump of tight emotion in my throat, and my eyes burn with hot tears. I blink, digging my fingers into my palms. “Do you know what you want to eat?”
“Just some toast for me,” Shirley tells me with a well-practiced grin. Someone as old as her would be expected to be kind and caring, but I know she’s just trying to feel me out. She sees my mother as a victim and me as a careless teen with no thought for anyone but myself. “And can you bring some strawberry jelly, dear?”
I nod quickly, turning on my heel and nearly falling over my own feet.
I push the order into the ticket holder. Any moment I feel the tears will start, and I hurry to the back door of the diner. A rush of October wind through the opened door makes my teeth chatter.
I press a hand over my mouth and just let myself cry for a moment, leaning against the brick wall beside the door. I feel like I’ve been holding it in for so long, and between the kiss with Eddie and the way Shirley just assumed I was a lazy, uncaring daughter to my mother, my tipping point really has been reached today.
I’ve been at work for less than an hour, and I’m already crying.
Suddenly, my mind takes me to a place that feels a lot like peace. It’s Eddie I see, and his dark, long hair glimmering in the warm sun. Autumn turns the trees orange around him, and he’s wrapping me in his embrace, pulling me so close.
I tip my head back against the brick wall behind me. Too much is happening at once, and I feel overwhelmed in the midst of it all. A kiss is one thing, but it’s hard to believe that a man like Eddie, a man I’ve known since I was a kid, is actually interested in me. I don’t want to imagine that he thinks I’m too young for him.
I don’t want to bring that sort of devastation to my mind. I can’t take it.
If Eddie isn’t actually interested in me, I think the whole world might crumble around me. Sure, I can handle it, but I don’t want to. For all of the stress on my shoulders, all I can think about is Eddie.
I want him so bad that it hurts.
My chest feels tight. My mind whirls with thoughts of him now that some of my sadness has dissipated. Flashes of him twist and turn in my head. I don’t know how I will face him again at the club if I’m wrong about him.
What if he was just being polite when he kissed me back? What if….?
Maybe he won’t even show up when I get off at lunch.
Carlos yells at me to get back inside of the diner, and I turn reluctantly to head back inside. I run to clean the table that Shirley has recently vacated.
Somehow, I convince Carlos that I have “feminine issues,” and he looks so disturbed that he lets me stack supplies in the back for an hour or so. The new bus boy and Carlos are both taking orders while I’m busy, though Barb will be back tomorrow, so they won’t need to suffer for too long just on my account.
When I finally heard Shirley leave the diner while I was outside, the well wishes she had given out to Carlos sounded fake to me. I can’t get her opinion of me out of my head for some reason.
I know what some people might think of me and their opinions, but it’s never hit me like it is now. I work hard to keep food on the table for my brother, and no one knows it.