Total pages in book: 134
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
What happens if you were half a person to begin with?
I knew the answer.
Devon.
He completed me.
We were both halves, who made each other whole.
I hated him…
That’s a lie.
I hated myself.
I crept up off the floor, as my skin made me itch, my mind made me burn, and my reflection in the mirror made me sick. I looked at the disaster displayed before me, mascara ran all down my face, my lips were swollen, and my eyes were red; burning bright with my pain.
My misery.
The exact same one I created. I was my own worst fucking nightmare.
Now I would be Devon’s, too.
It was then that I heard the moaning, groaning, the sounds of pure impassioned fucking, coming from the living room. The precise place that I had just ran from. I darted from my life, seeking refuge, and it crumbled right in front of my very own eyes. All through the motions of the man I loved. The man I love. Every time I shut my eyes, I could still see his handsome lifeless face.
See… I killed him, too.
My hand caught my mouth, and I hurled my head over to the toilet. I heaved over and over again.
Getting rid of the drugs.
The alcohol.
The shame and regret.
It effortlessly soared out of me, as easily as it did going in.
I spit out the rest of it, and wiped my lips with the back of my hand. I rinsed my mouth out with water. I zealously shook my head, side-to-side, trying to get rid of the sounds and the images of Devon.
His hands.
His mouth.
His words.
They were forever severed in my soul. It was now a piece of me that I would never be able to detach myself from. It made itself a home, right next to the hollow hole that used to be my heart. I looked down at the ground, and saw our love splattered on the tile. I subconsciously stepped back, not wanting to step in it any longer. The echoes from the living room bounced off the walls, and it made me cover my ears. I closed my eyes, but it only made it worse.
I screamed out my frustration, unleashing the rage, the wrath I no longer had any control over. It pounded into me as furiously as Devon did minutes ago. I opened the door, and slowly walked toward the living room. No one had stopped what they were doing, as I was dying on the bathroom floor.
No one cared.
No one listened.
No one helped me
No one stopped.
Nothing.
I took one last look around the room. “Get. The. Fuck. Out!” I shouted, and everyone froze in place, staring at me with wide eyes that resembled my own.
Deer in headlights.
Bambi.
When they didn’t move, my hands went to the table in front of me, and I swiftly cleared all the contents to the floor. The sounds of glass crashing onto the hardwood floor, was mocking me… my heart shattering the exact same way.
It was everywhere and all around me.
I couldn’t run.
I couldn’t escape.
I couldn’t hide.
“GET THE FUCK OUT! NOW!” I screamed bloody murder, and that’s when they moved. They gathered like a herd, grabbing clothes, and whatever else. I didn’t stop, I kept moving because I knew once I did I would crash, and possibly not ever get up.
I scurried around the condo, my feet stomping everywhere I stepped, and leaving a path of destruction in its wake. Throwing pictures, vases; I went after anything I could find, my eyes blurred with nothing but tears, and my body twisted with the desire to fall apart.
“I fucking hate you! I fucking hate you so much!” I yelled, talking to myself. I repeated it over and over to let it sink into my pores, and make it become a part of me.
“Miss Stevens,” I heard someone say. I immediately stopped, dismayed, looking where the voice came from.
The guard’s hands were in the air in front of him, cautious. “Are you okay? You’re trashing the condo, and your guests flew out of here like a bat out of hell.”
“Why did you let him up here? He wasn’t invited! He shouldn’t have been up here! Do you know what you did? What happened? Why did you let him up here?” I asked again, trying to keep calm, even though all I wanted to do was scream, and take out all my frustrations on him.
“Miss Stevens, you know I would never do that. I got approval when I didn’t see his name on the list,” he explained.
I lowered my eyebrows and cocked my head to the side. “Approval?”
He nodded. “Of course, I would never let anyone up here without approval first.”
“Who the fuck gave you approval, Raul?” I questioned, waiting on pins and needles for him to reply, although I already knew the answer.
“Madam,” he stated, repeating the exact same name that just went through my mind.