Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 82472 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 412(@200wpm)___ 330(@250wpm)___ 275(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82472 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 412(@200wpm)___ 330(@250wpm)___ 275(@300wpm)
“Dad came to get them,” I informed her. “They’ll be back tomorrow. Because tonight”—I headed to the fridge and opened the freezer, taking out the bottle of Grey Goose she always put away—“we purge him from your system.” I took a couple of shot glasses out of the cabinet. “Or at least till you pass out.” I poured the first shot. “To assholes and the skanks who fuck ’em.”
She grabbed the shot and downed it, then winced. “Burns.” She slammed the glass down again as I poured another shot. “To women without stains on their shirts and their hair perfect.”
I raised a brow in question but took the shot anyway and poured another one.
“To husbands who leave the toilet seat up and finally manscape for another woman.”
“Oh, honey.” I placed my glass on the table. “Did he actually have a bush?”
Tears welled up in her eyes. “That should have been my first clue, right?”
“It should have been the first clue to run for the hills, but who are we to judge.” I picked up the glass. “To bigger dicks and manscaped pubes.”
She clicked my shot glass and downed her third shot in a row.
“I think I’m going to be sick.” She ran from the room. That was the beginning of let’s destroy Jake. She dusted herself off all right, started doing yoga with me and spin classes. All her frustration was put into what I called revenge body.
A knock on the door makes my head pop up. “Auntie Kay, can you do a fishtail bwaid for me?” my niece, Rachel, says from the other side of the door. “Pwease. Momma is trying on dresses.”
I roll out of bed and grab my robe before unlocking the door. I open it and she runs in and plops down on my king-size bed. It’s a small room that fits just my bed and a dresser, but has a huge closet, so I’m okay. The bedding looks like I sleep on a cloud and that’s because I sleep with two down comforters.
“So what type of braid do you want?” I ask her, sitting behind her on my bed.
“One like Awielle.”
I continue to comb her hair, making her a short mermaid braid. “Okay, sweet pea, go get dressed before your mom yells again with a warning.” I kiss the top of her head, watching her bounce out of the room. I dress after she closes the door, then head downstairs to get myself a coffee. Stopping at the door, I bring in the newspaper that was thrown on the doormat.
I’m sitting on a stool reading the paper while my sister runs around yelling out the time limits. Today is the first day at her new job. She’s going back to work. She took a job as a temp, not what she was looking for, but it’s better than nothing. I know she’s a nervous wreck because she’s been nonstop pacing without even realizing it.
I’m in my yoga pants trying to enjoy my second cup of coffee, my loose sweater falling off one shoulder. I’m not wearing a bra, because, well, frankly I’m not in the mood for it. My perfect size B cups are not going anywhere. “How do you remember this stuff?” I ask her while she starts putting the breakfast plates into the sink.
“It’s magic. Once you become a parent, you’ll get a brain,” she tells me with a smirk.
“Then what happened to Jake?” I smile back while taking a sip of my now almost cold coffee.
“Okay, I take that back. Once you become a mother, you get a brain. I mean, I don’t think all men are dicks. Look at Dad,” she tells me while she puts the milk back in the fridge and picks up the cereal box, putting it back into the cupboard. Her phone alarm sounds again. Another thing, my sister is OCD with being late. “Two minutes, guys!” She even has different alarm sounds.
“Aren’t you going to be late?” she asks me while she grabs the lunch boxes and walks to the door with the kids.
I fold the paper in half. “Nope, I have a client at ten-thirty. We are doing yoga in the park today. Become one with the earth and all that.” I finish it off with Namaste hands while she walks out with the kids to go to the bus stop.
I check my phone to see what else my day has in store for me. It’s not like I can’t afford to be in my own place; it’s because this is where I belong for now. I take in the house and how it’s changed since that fateful day eight months ago.
I snap back to the present when I hear the bus honk its horn. I walk to the living room where I move the coffee table to the side and start with my stretching moves. Lauren walks back in, admitting that she’s nervous.