Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 97337 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97337 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
With no real knowledge of how these things work, my first impulse was panic. I hate the feeling of inadequacy, of feeling out of my depth in any given situation. But last night seems to have reached a turning point of sorts.
Somehow in the midst of all my confusion, that thought stuck with me. The otherwise innocent act of him following me home in his car now seemed like anything but. And it was useless pretending even to myself that we hadn’t crossed the line.
This time when he waited for me out in the dark parking lot, it seemed we both were reluctant to leave. I knew it was dangerous to be out in the open like this for any length of time, but the thought of going home to my empty little house to wile away the hours until sleep, daydreaming about him, was daunting.
He seemed to catch on to my reticence to leave and started up a conversation. “Can I take you somewhere?” His words sent my heart into overdrive and once again I found myself at a crossroads.
“What?” My voice sounded foreign even to my own ears. Maybe because my heart was lodged somewhere in my throat. He’d caught me in the middle of one of my new fantasies. A fantasy where I was seeing his naked chest. A fantasy that made those tingles I usually get in his presence become so much more.
“What do you mean?”
“There’s nothing to be afraid of, just follow me. You’ll like it I promise.” I nodded my head stupidly, all the while cautioning myself. So far we hadn’t crossed any boundaries, hadn’t done anything I couldn’t explain away if need be, but…
Again I just nodded my head and climbed into my car. He’d graduated to holding the door open for me and closing it behind me. Tonight he leaned in and pulled the seatbelt snug across my middle and snapped it around my hip. I forgot how to breathe.
Once again my glasses saved me as he didn’t move away immediately, but stayed there almost suspended in time as he looked down at me. Can he hear my heart beating or is it just me? I didn’t release my breath until he moved away and closed the door.
Liz
I had no idea where we were going, but I knew that tonight would change things. I can no longer pretend to myself, could no longer keep it all in my head. I was very aware that I was crossing a line. A line that I’d never have expected someone like me to blur let alone jump over with both feet.
It felt almost like I was standing on the sidelines watching it all happen, unable and unwilling to stop it. I was afraid though to take that last step. To admit to myself that I wanted this. Afraid of what would transpire once I move my toe one step over the line into the forbidden.
My body was responding without my say-so. Though alarm bells clanged in my head, my heart and feet were on a forward march as I followed him through the night into the unknown.
He drove out to the Sound overlooking the water. A place of which I’d heard but had had no reason to visit before. The scenery was tranquil, the kind of place I love and I was touched. How did he know that I’d appreciate something like this?
We didn’t speak for the first few minutes as he led me to a spot near the edge looking out over the water under the starlit sky. It was beautiful! Just when my nerves were about to fray from the silence he spoke. “What made you choose to move here?”
I cleared my throat and tried not to stare at his beautiful profile like a deviant. “I met the principal of the high school years ago at a retreat. She told me all about this place and I kinda fell in love with it just from her description alone. Once I was out of university she offered me the job and that was that.”
He seemed to go over my words in his head before carrying on again and I couldn’t help but notice how mature he seemed, and how much different to what I’d expect from a high school jock.
“What about your family, where are they?”
“I don’t really have any to speak of, just an aunt and a few cousins back home.”
“And where is that?”
“A place called Haddonfield New Jersey.”
Again he grew silent but since he wasn’t looking my way, just staring out over the water, I had no idea what he was thinking. And then he reached for my hand and my heart literally stopped beating in my chest for a few seconds that felt more like hours.
“I’m wondering if I should wait until the class is over before taking you to bed.” My eyes almost popped out of my head and I tried releasing his hold on my hand to no avail. Now my beating heart was in my lungs as my thoughts splintered.