Total pages in book: 169
Estimated words: 156210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 521(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 156210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 521(@300wpm)
I can’t take it. I pull my leg up over the saddle and sit sideways with my legs over his thigh so I can hug him. “Not even your father?” I ask. I want him to know he can talk to me about it. He seems so strong, so put-together, but I’m noticing the cracks now, and all I want to do is mold myself into them and be the soothing balm he needs.
Kyran’s quiet, and he plays with my fingers as Crab continues down the path. When he speaks, his voice sounds as if it’s coming out of a hollow log. “My father never spoke to me. He was always of the belief that a twin shouldn’t be left alive. He never said my name, only called me the Sunspawn. Mother was the one to set me up in the shadowild. And my brother? He enjoyed having me do all his dirty work. But he’d never thank me. He felt it was I who owed him my very existence. That I should be grateful he gave me the opportunity to leave the shadowild at all.”
I know what Kyran thinks about that by the way he clenches his jaw. I rest my cheek against his chest, and even the strange, rubbery feel of the leather can’t dissuade me. When we made our agreement, I had the hots for him and a lot of mixed feelings, but within just a week, we’ve become so… close. Maybe that’s bound to happen when two people with gaping holes in their hearts attract each other.
“I’m sorry you only had so much time with your mom. I read some of her notes on bats today, and she seemed to be a very passionate person.”
“‘Notes’?” Kyran’s head jerks up. “What notes?”
“In the library. She wrote several books about different creatures, but she never finished the one on bats, so Sabine let me look at her notes.” I clear my throat because it’s about to clench with sadness. “She wrote your name on the margin. She wanted to try taming one of the bats for you. So you wouldn’t be alone. Kyran. Not Kyranis. She must have loved you.”
A strange noise leaves Kyran’s throat, and he lowers his gaze, his hand tense in mine. “She should have taken me with her. I would have protected her from the despairs. I might have been ten, but… I was already excelling, and I could have—”
I rise to kiss him. The shadowy eels on his body are proof of what he can do, but I now see the vulnerable parts of him, and I’ll do anything to protect them. I have to remember that it hasn’t even been a month since his brother died, and all of a sudden he has to deal with the world in a whole new way. He’d never admit it, but I imagine he must be overwhelmed with the freedom and afraid it might be taken away at the snap of someone’s fingers.
“You were put in an impossible position as a child,” I say and stroke his cheek, fighting my own demons. Maybe I see a bit of him in me because of my own miserable upbringing. I wish someone could have been kind to me too.
“Do you really not mind?” Kyran asks. “My brother was an awful person. But also the real prince.”
I smile at him and give him another kiss. “I’ve heard quite a few things about him, and he sounds absolutely terrible, so no, I not only ‘don’t mind’ prefer my dark prince. Let’s be honest,” I cup his cheek, trying to lighten the mood. “With a face like this, I would have probably fucked him, but I wouldn’t stick around for a rotten personality.”
Kyran stiffens and takes hold of my arm. “I wouldn’t have let you. He never liked men. Not really. You deserve better.”
I don’t know if he’s just worried about me, or jealous, but I kinda like it regardless.
“Is that why you waited seven years? Did you dissuade him from taking me? Or do you have laws on abductions needing to be age-appropriate?” I wink at him.
There’s miles of countryside around us and a dense forest to one side of the road, yet I feel so safe with him even the stupid cows can’t distract me. I need to know what he truly feels, yet I’m so afraid of ending up as a gullible dumbass who sold his soul to the devil.
Kyran laughs. “It’s risky to fish for souls, and he didn’t want to endanger his princely life, so after our father died, he told me to pick a human for him. Since we are identical, the bond would have worked for us both. But he wanted a girl, and I found a boy to spite him. I’m sorry,” he adds in a soft voice as the glow of the green lantern deepens the shadows on his features. “I think he didn’t want to deal with that for as long as possible, too busy finding new lovers and pleasures to indulge in. I think deep down he might have known I’d be the one making the bond, because he wouldn’t be the one fighting Heartbreak once it came back. But he didn’t want me to have anyone. As if that could make me more real. If anyone knew he wasn’t half the shadow wielder he claimed to be, his world would have crumbled.”