Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 88128 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 441(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 88128 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 441(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
“But Maureen is your mamaw, and she lives here. And me and my daddy. We live here, and I gots lots of aunts and uncles that I’ll share with you.”
“Oh, Blake.” My voice cracks. “I know that you’re little and don’t understand, but sometimes things are just not that easy.”
“I’d be real good,” she tells me, further twisting the knife into my chest.
“You’re such a good girl,” I tell her. “My going home has nothing to do with you. That’s my home. That’s where I live.”
“We have a big house,” she tells me. “Daddy can share his room ’cause that’s what mommies do, or I’ll share mine.”
The innocence of a child. “You’re so good at sharing,” I tell her.
My eyes find Declan’s. I’m pleading with him to help me help her understand. However, it’s not Declan that comes to my rescue. It’s Sterling.
“Blakely, I need cake.”
“Cake?” She sits up on my lap. “I like cake.”
Sterling smiles softly. “Yeah? You want to help me grab a slice for Tink and me?”
“Yes!” She’s off my lap in a flash and racing around the table, taking Sterling’s hand. His eyes find mine and I mouth, “Thank you.” He looks at Declan and nods before turning and walking away.
“What have we done?” I ask, staring after them.
“Nothing,” Ramsey assures me. “She’s a little girl who doesn’t understand what this is.” She points between Declan and me. “She’s resilient. No matter what happens, she’s going to be okay. She has a huge support system to make sure of it.”
“We’re all here for you,” Alyssa says, wiping a tear from her eye. “Whatever you need.”
“We shouldn’t have let this happen,” I tell Declan. “We’re hurting her.”
“And what? Do you think that this doesn’t hurt me? Do you think I like knowing that my daughter wants you to stay just as badly as I do? I let her get close to you. This is on me.”
“We both knew that I was only here for a limited amount of time,” I remind him. A lone tear slides over my cheek. “I was selfish. I wanted time with both of you.”
Declan turns to face me. He studies me, the anguish in his eyes matching my own. “Stay.”
My mouth drops open. My eyes dart around the table. Ramsey and Alyssa both have small smiles on their faces while Deacon watches Declan closely.
“We said we would talk about this later.” I really don’t want to have this conversation in front of his family. They've heard and seen enough already.
“Let’s go then.” Declan pushes back from the table and offers me his hand.
“Blakely.”
As if she knew we were talking about her, she comes racing over and grips Declan’s legs. “Daddy, Papaw said I can spend the night and make a fort!” All sadness from earlier is washed away.
“We’re heading out,” Raymond says, joining us. “You mind if we take her for the night?”
“You sure? She’s there all week.”
“Am I sure? Yes. She’s my princess. The house is too quiet these days. Besides, I’ve been promising to have a fort camp out with her for a while now.”
“Please, Daddy? I’ll be real good.”
“Of course you can.” Declan lifts her in the air, making her laugh. As he lowers her, he kisses her cheek.
“Kenny kiss too,” Blakely tells him. She leans over, and I kiss her cheek. When she’s back on her feet, she takes Raymond’s hand, and they walk away.
“Ready?” Declan offers me his hand, and I take it. He leads me to Brooks and Palmer so we can say our goodbyes and then head out to his truck.
I’m not ready for this to be my last night with him, but we have to stop. We can’t keep doing this to Blakely or to ourselves. The entire drive to his place I fight my battle with tears. I need to stay strong. It’s not lost on me that walking away from Declan and Blakely hurts a million times worse than my marriage ending.
CHAPTER
TWENTY
Declan
The drive to my place is quiet. I hold Kennedy’s hand tightly in mine, resting them on my lap. I’ve asked her to stay twice now, and she’s yet to answer me either way. I see the worry and the hesitancy in her eyes. I wish I knew what to do or say to take that away. I wish she could see inside my mind and my heart to know that I want her.
We want her.
My baby girl loves her just as much as I do. She ripped my heart to shreds earlier. I wasn’t able to find the words to help her because, in my mind, I was begging Kennedy to stay with us too.
I understand she’s freshly out of a divorce. I get that she’s scared, I do, but so I am. I’m afraid she’s going to drive away from us. I’m afraid that both my daughter and I have fallen in love with her, and she doesn’t love us back. There are so many worries and fears, but I still want her.