Total pages in book: 108
Estimated words: 101261 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101261 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
A single tear rolled down her flawless cheek. "Of course, I didn't."
"Then why didn't you stop him?" Neil asked.
And now, there was no other answer she could give. She bowed her head. "Because I was afraid."
"Of Laurence," Neil clarified.
She answered with a short nod as her face crumpled.
"Come on, baby," Rudy said, putting his arm around her shoulders. "Come on, let's sit down."
"I'll get you some water," I said, spying the wet bar in the corner. I dashed over and found Evian in the wine refrigerator. She didn't look at me when I handed it to her, but she took it.
"Why is Laurence so angry at Neil?" El-Mudad asked. "I don't have all the history here, and this doesn't make sense to me."
"Valerie is still in love with Neil." There was no sense pretending we didn't all know it. At least, Neil and Rudy and Valerie and I did. I had a suspicion that El-Mudad hadn't quite accepted it as fact.
He had no choice but to when Valerie lifted her head. "It's true."
Neil turned away, staring out the window at the deepening twilight.
"Can you imagine what that's like, Sophie?" Valerie asked, her tone hard and bitter. "Can you imagine what it would be like to have had Neil's love and lose it?"
My throat went dry, but I managed to say, "I would die."
"You wouldn't," Neil said, quick to absolve himself.
I took a deep breath. "You're right. I wouldn't. But Valerie, there was a time when Neil was willing to choose death over staying alive, living his life with me. He was willing to walk out on me that way. So, I think I know a little bit of the hurt you've gone through all of these years. I know we talked about it before, when Neil and I were getting married. And I know that for things to work out the way you wanted them to, I would have to be shattered. I can't imagine that desperation."
But I had seen it—years before, standing on the sidewalk in front of a baby store.
I started again. "I met Elizabeth once. Just once. We ran into her when we were buying a present for..." I didn't want to conjure up thoughts of a happier time when the most significant conflict between Neil and Valerie had been over who could buy Emma the most baby presents. "She was upset to see us together. Really, really upset. And I thought to myself, I could never be that woman on the sidewalk. Ever. I could never get over Neil."
"Well, I'm glad you had that enlightening experience," Valerie said, the words like bitter venom.
"What I'm trying to say is, I don't hold it against you. Loving Neil, I mean. You can't control who you love." I paused. "Just like nobody here is going to hold it against you that you love Laurence."
"Do you love him?" Neil asked, never turning away from the window. When he did finally face us, his throat moved with a swallow. "Is that what this is about?"
"I love him," she said with a short nod. "But I'm so afraid of him."
"Is that why you didn't stop him from calling CPS? Because you love him? Or because you were afraid of him?" Rudy asked.
After a long moment, she admitted, "Both."
Neil paced with his hands in his pockets. "I know you. And I know how you love. Fiercely, protectively. But you would never allow someone to harm Olivia. And you did. So, was it loyalty to your husband that caused this acrimony? Loyalty given freely, out of deep love for him?"
She didn't answer, hanging her head and covering her eyes with one hand. Rudy rubbed her back and leaned over to kiss the top of her head. "We didn't come here to ambush you. I promise we're not here to yell at you or shame you. But you need help, baby. He's not good for you. And I'm afraid I'm going to lose you."
"We all are," I added. "Despite everything, I would be...destroyed if something happened to you. Especially if there was a way I could have helped prevent it from happening."
"What could you do?" Valerie demanded, looking up with a sarcastic smile. "Do you think you can wave a magic wand and make him disappear from my life? I have nothing, Sophie. All of the bank accounts are in his name now. Everything I own is his. The house, everything. He convinced me to sign all of it over to him after Emma died, so he could manage things for me while I grieved. And I was so relieved to have someone to lean on, someone who wanted to look after me and care for me. I'm not even sure I can legally walk out of the house with my own clothes without it being a robbery."