Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 99960 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 500(@200wpm)___ 400(@250wpm)___ 333(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 99960 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 500(@200wpm)___ 400(@250wpm)___ 333(@300wpm)
Anger burned hot through me and my grip on her back tightened. “I’m sorry.”
Allegra met my gaze. “Nothing really bad happened, but it scared me. Suddenly, I wasn’t being treated like a kid anymore, but I was still a kid. I was so scared of it all, but none of my friends seemed to be. They talked about sex like they were grown-ups. Looking back, I know now they were all bluster and trying to be cool. But back then, I thought there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t ready to feel that way about my body yet. I decided that the only way to not be afraid was to face my fear. That summer, Dad invited me to be on set of his movie. There were a few younger actors. One of them was seventeen and he was very attentive. So I had sex with him.”
I’d never have touched a fourteen-year-old when I was seventeen. In fact, I’d never even when I was fourteen. Despite my own young age, the girls I’d had sex with at that time had all been older. “Creep,” I snarled.
“Yeah, turned out he really was. And, of course, I didn’t get over my fear of being sexual, being seen as sexual. I just felt … used.” With a heavy sigh, Allegra rested her cheek on my chest again and I held her fast. I hated that for her. I hated that her entire teenage years had been such a fucking mess in general.
“The next time was with Dax. He’s Moira Reynolds’s son and he was my first real boyfriend. He dumped me when the paparazzi started following us. I thought I cared about him. I probably did as much as fourteen-year-old me could. Then Ashton. I did care about him.” Her voice shook a little as she spoke about him, and I knew no matter how much therapy or how much confiding she did, Allegra would always carry guilt over the boy.
“But he was the last person I had any real feelings for until you. Sex has just been sex … until you.” She rested her palm over my heart. “It used to drive me crazy that I wanted you so badly and you didn’t seem to want me back. People only see me as a pretty face, and I used to tell myself that it was okay, because at least they found something worthy about me, even if it was the way I looked, which I couldn’t take credit for. But you didn’t seem to want me for any reason … and I used to wonder what it was about me that you found so off-putting.” She chuckled, but I heard the hurt there. Even after the last week of me worshipping every inch of her, she was still hurt I’d kept my distance for five years.
A pang of regret scored across my chest. I touched her chin, forcing her to look at me. For her, I would be honest, even if it cost me something. “I stayed away because I knew that once with you would never be enough … and that I’d spend the rest of my life wanting someone I couldn’t have.”
Tears cast a wet sheen over her eyes. “Jared …”
“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known … but you’re so much more than that. You walk into a room and you light it up. People gravitate toward you. And it’s not just because you’re easy on the eyes, baby. It’s because they feel your goodness and it makes them feel good too. You don’t judge. You’re always kind. You defend people you care about no matter what it costs. You’re a fierce, fierce sister and friend. And you’re so fucking talented, it blows my mind. And people see that in you, Allegra. I see that in you. I always have.”
“Jared.” She suddenly reached for me, her kiss hungry and desperate and it instantly ignited my own need.
I held on to her as I launched up off the couch. This time it was my turn and I wanted her in my bed so I could take her as hard and as deep as we both needed. Because I could feel this thing between us buzzing through our veins like electricity. Overwhelming. Too much.
It was too much.
It was possible devastation.
But I couldn’t have stopped myself from being with Allegra if the world depended upon it.
As we crashed down onto my bed, I powered into her, her now familiar cries of pleasure causing a hot zing through my blood.
“Mine,” I growled against her lips as I fucked her.
Her fingernails bit into my back as she arched into me and gasped, “Yours.”
“Yours.” The word was guttural but freely given back to her.
Joy suffused the physical pleasure on her face and her thighs tightened around my hips. “Mine.”