Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 126003 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 630(@200wpm)___ 504(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 126003 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 630(@200wpm)___ 504(@250wpm)___ 420(@300wpm)
“OK.”
“You asked how do I live? And that’s why I’m saying this.”
“I get it, just get on with it.”
“Well, I decided very young that I was gonna survive. That’s all it is. It’s just survival.”
“But you’re good at it, Irina. Like… professional-level good at it.”
“So are you. I mean, you’re still here, right?”
“Barely.”
“I’m gonna die one day. I know this. Have always accepted it. I don’t have anything for them to hold over me. No family, no real friends, no boy, no child, no brother or sister. I don’t need things, either. I’m happy with nothing. It’s a game, like you said that one day. I never put it in those terms the way you did, but I decided, very young, that I’m going to survive. Still, we all die. And when the time comes, when I’m about to die, then I will go out in a blaze of glory. I don’t really think about revenge. I don’t know if I want to kill them. But if they’re there? And I see them? And I have a chance? Then yeah. I would not mind dying that way.”
His smile is slow. Just like the way he moves across the bed in my direction. Suddenly, all the space between us has been erased and his hand is on the side of my face, the way it was last night when I pulled away and chickened out.
This time I don’t pull away. I let him get closer. I close my eyes and wait for the kiss. And when his mouth touches mine, I smile into it, opening up a little, enough for his tongue to slowly slip inside my mouth. Then we’re kissing. Really kissing, the way I’ve seen people do it in the movies.
I don’t overthink it. I don’t analyze it. I just let him show me what to do.
When he pulls away, he’s grinning at me. A fingertip lazily pushes a piece of hair out of my eyes and then he settles back, pulling me with him. Opening his arms for me.
I slide closer, turning my body a little, angling into his chest. And then those arms are around me and I can’t for the life of me ever remember feeling so cared for and safe.
“Irina?”
“Hmm.”
“I think I love you right now.”
I almost turn, try to actually, but he doesn’t let me. His arms don’t loosen. “What?”
“That little speech you just gave? The ‘blaze of glory’ one?”
“It’s… stupid?”
“No.” He chuckles. “It’s just… I gave myself the same pep talk the very day I met you.”
I smile. “Fate.” I let out an exhale of relief and then… sleep.
The next time I wake up another phone is buzzing, but this time it’s coming from somewhere else in the condo.
“Shit. That must be you.” Eason unwraps himself from me and gets up, leaving the bedroom to go searching for my phone. He comes back a minute later holding it, but it’s no longer buzzing. “How do you not have a lock screen?” He gets back in bed, his fingertips scrolling.
I reach for the phone, but he holds it out of my reach, smiling. “It’s the rule, ya know.”
“What’s the rule?”
“No lock screen, no privacy.” He’s still grinning, but slowly it fades. Then he looks at me. “You only have four contacts? Nandy, Dog, that restaurant, and me.” He turns his head to see me properly. “You’ve got nothing to hide, I guess. Why bother with a lock screen?”
“I told you. Unattached, unaffected.”
“You do realize that they could go after Nandy? So your little ‘blaze of glory’ plan has a hole in it.”
“Shit.” I practically guffaw. “Let them try. Nandy Jardinez comes from a Cuban crime family.”
“Shut up.”
“Swear to God. Why do you think I like them so much? I’m no American Mafia expert or anything, but trust me when I say this, Brazil is as corrupt as they come. All of it. And the favelas are run by families just like hers.”
“Hmm.”
“Hedging your bets on that dinner?”
“You’re like a prophet or something. The text was from her. She wants to come to dinner tonight.”
“We should cancel.”
“Fuck that.” He hands me the phone.
I take it, but I don’t look at the text. I’m looking at him. In a new way, actually.
He looks right back at me, not at all shy about anything. “I’m not sure I believe you about her family, but if that’s true, then who the fuck is she to judge me?”
“What?” I sit up a little.
He takes the phone back and his fingers start tapping. “I’ll show her. Eight. I’m telling her to come at eight. And there. She now has my address. She’s looking it up right now, realizing what building I live in and—” My phone buzzes. He grins. “That’s her now being properly impressed.”
I take the phone from him and read the text out loud. “‘Are you dating a gangster?’” Then I snicker at him as I text back and talk at the same time. “‘No, he’s a cage fighter.’”