Total pages in book: 39
Estimated words: 36597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 183(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 122(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 36597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 183(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 122(@300wpm)
Immediately he whipped his head around. Instead of softening him, of bringing him back to the here and now, back to Millie, he snarled at her. “Not your love!” he bit out. “You don’t want me beyond a fuck in the back of a truck!” Voicing that thought was more than he could handle. Shadow threw back his head and roared.
“So? When did you ever let that stop you? I thought you wanted more with me.” Millie was undaunted. She could handle this. She could take Shadow’s worst and not run. Hell, she wouldn’t even flinch.
“Do,” he said, shaking his head as if to clear it. He got to his feet from where he’d been kneeling over the man he was beating to death. A rage still burned deep, but Millie could see his struggle. He was fighting hard. For her. He took a step toward Millie. “I’m a killer.” He waved his hand at the carnage behind him. “You don’t want a killer in your life.”
“Why would you say that?” She tilted her head, genuinely confused. “You think I’ve not killed? I’ve killed opponents in fights like the one where you found me. Some on purpose, because they deserve it. Some accidentally, when they were winning and instinct took over. I try not to, but it happens.” Millie knew she was getting through to him. He was still riding a fine edge, but she was getting there.
“You saw what I just did! I get in a rage and can’t control myself! My temper was always hot on the best of days. Things happened in war or when I was sent with ExFil to do a job and sometimes, when backed into a corner, I can’t control the rage!” He yelled at her, looking frustrated she couldn’t see that he was so close to the edge of madness.
“So? Neither can I. We’ll work on it together.”
He took another step toward her. Millie didn’t back down, but she didn’t move forward either. Shadow had to come to her on his own.
“My ex filed a domestic violence charge on me, Millie. No one knows it but Cain and Stunner.”
She shook her head. “She might have accused you of abuse, but you’d never hurt a woman. Not like that.” The longer he talked to her, focused on her, the more she could see Shadow getting a grip on himself.
“You sure? The law wasn’t so forgiving.”
Millie did go to him then. “Then they were fools. Your protective instincts are off the chart. No way you hit a woman. Not with your size and strength. You’re always so careful. Even of me, and I can kick your ass in the ring no problem.”
That got a chuckle out of him, and he closed the small distance still separating them, pulling her into his arms. “You’re a fuckin’ miracle, Lyudmila. Just a Goddamned fuckin’ miracle.” She had him back. She’d helped him work through his rage just like she knew she could. They were meant to be together.
“Let’s get back to truck and get out of here. Katya needs to get out of here and we need to get back to Poland before anyone finds mess we made.”
“Where is she? Did I scare her?”
She shrugged. “Not sure. But she’s made of sterner stuff than you think. She made it out of that fucking maze without much more than a whimper. She saw me kill. If she’s not running from me, I doubt she’ll run from you.”
Shadow chuckled. “Honey, you’re five foot nothing and maybe a hundred pounds. I’m six feet nine and three hundred pounds. More of me to be scared of.”
Millie shoved away from him. “Just because I’m short doesn’t mean I don’t pack punch! I can still take you in a fight. Fair or otherwise.”
“Not sure about that, sugar. Physics apply.”
She bared her teeth at him. “When we get out of here, I’ll prove to you I’m right.”
“Sure. Just make sure there’s Jell-O involved, and I’m your man.”
“Ooohh!” Millie stomped off, not really mad. More relieved. The old Shadow was back. She’d taken him completely out of whatever hell he was in and brought him back to her. She’d figure out the rest later. Starting with the past he’d revealed to her.
* * *
The rage and fear roiling inside Shadow was hard to control. Even once they were in Poland and the relative safety of the ExFil camp, he couldn’t get rid of the excess energy. It rarely got this bad, but the fight outside that bastard’s home had been one for the ages. On any normal occasion, it wouldn’t have been a big deal. He had guns. He could use them in that kind of situation even if they were in stealth mode. But he’d had the women to protect. One of them only nine years old. Yeah, he was well aware Millie could take care of herself and her sister, but he’d staked a claim on her, and his mind refused to let it go. Looking back, he had no idea how he could have ever mistaken what he’d felt for Carrianne as anything close to love. Hell, he hadn’t even been that possessive of her. He’d liked the idea of her. A woman of his own. But he hadn’t loved her. There was no way he could say the same thing about Millie.