Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 112755 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 564(@200wpm)___ 451(@250wpm)___ 376(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 112755 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 564(@200wpm)___ 451(@250wpm)___ 376(@300wpm)
Don’t nobody understand my pain. Don’t nobody see me. Don’t nobody see my evil, and love me anyway. It just can’t be. The beast in me that hates so hard refuses to be put to death. I’m practically fallin’ in love with an incredible woman, and I STILL want to tear this planet apart! She hugs me. Makes time for me. Makes me laugh. Cooks for me. Helps me, and I’m STILL pissed the fuck off. I would set the world on fire in a flash if I could. Love didn’t work to fix me, Ms. Florence! You were wrong! You put someone in my life, who I still can’t tell my truth to.
You wanted me to confront my evil, to see it for what it is, but I can’t do it the way you want me to. Desiree deserves the truth, but I can’t give it to her. I wanted to… I did… but I can’t. I’m broken. Ain’t no fixin’ it. Ain’t no fixin’ me. This is what happens when ya mama lets the world eat you up, and stands by and burps the Earth after it consumes you. She handed it a glass of water to wash me down. I look at my mama and sometimes wish she would drop dead. I hate just about everybody, and now, I hate myself.
A tear rolled down his cheek, and he tossed the shard to the side.
Mama was right about one thing: I ain’t any good. If Desiree knew the truth, she’d be afraid of me. Maybe I should be afraid of me, too…
Chapter Thirteen
Legend blew out the black candle in his bedroom as ‘Ivana Santilli’s, “Sun + Moon = Tomorrow,” played from a small CD player in his bedroom. The CD player belonged to an old friend of his that had passed away while he was in prison many years ago. On occasion, when he was feeling sentimental, he’d pull it out and play one of the CDs Lil’ Petey had. This was one of 8 of them. He grabbed his jacket, and pulled the hood over his head before stepping out of his apartment into the drenching rain with his satchel under his arm. He drove the long drive in silence, and pulled up to the old office building, with only one light on. Shining bright in the back. He lit a cigar, headed to the spot. And stood outside the front door. Waiting.
The door soon opened. Two men stood there with rifles. He opened his jacket, showing no weapons, then made his way down the hallway. His steps echoing throughout the place. Ortiz was on the phone when he entered. The old man quickly ended the phone call, grinned at him and slowly got to his feet.
Legend pulled out the money, slapped it in his hand.
“That’s it. The end. When do I get my ticket and my itinerary?”
“In three hours. You’ll be able to use it whenever you are ready.” Ortiz counted the cash, sniffed the money and slipped it into the desk drawer.
“After tonight, we are to never speak again, unless you wish to take my offer to join my organization.” Ortiz handed him a cigar.
“My feelings and position on the situation still stands. I’m out of that lifestyle. This would’ve been enticing a few years ago. I’m in a different headspace now. Got too much to lose, and what I got mapped out for me now? There’s a lot to gain.”
Ortiz grinned, but it was sinister, dark and evil.
“Legend, you’re not being true to yourself. You’re a natural born killer like myself. You’re a leader. People like us rule the world. We follow no man. Don’t fight your true nature. Killing. Dominating. Winning. It’s in your blood…”
“Family is what you make it. My real brothers didn’t come out my father’s nut sack, or my mama’s womb. Most of the people that share my bloodline stabbed me in the back. A stranger in a classroom saved my life. Two different women. Two different times in my life. One was a teacher. The other a fellow student. Really, they both were teachers, only one didn’t know it. Church. My lesson has been learned. Blood ain’t thicker than water, Ortiz, and water ain’t nothin’ but two tears in a bucket. Game recognize game. Monsters invented time. We watch clocks and body rock. It’s Slaughter time.”
And then, he walked out, cigar in hand…
…A couple of weeks later
Desiree looked at Mama, and her lips curled right before her mouth popped open, allowing a boisterous cloud of laughter to erupt. There the woman was in her car, white-knuckling the steering wheel as if she were going clean off a cliff.
“Mama, you said you wanted me to teach you to drive. We go through this every time. You said you were for real this time, but you’re wimpin’ out on me again. Look at yo’ face! You’d think I’d asked you to drive to the moon and then parachute from Pluto.”