Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
The door opened, and I heard Emma walk in. When I turned, she stood there with her shoulders squared off, ready for whatever it was she thought was coming.
“Hadley make it to school on time?”
Her brows drew in for a quick moment before she answered. “Yes, we had plenty of time still.”
“Good.” I motioned for her to sit down, but she stayed glued to her spot by the door. It was like she was keeping close to her escape route. My chest clenched at the idea that she might be afraid of me after this morning.
“No, thank you, I’d rather stand.”
With a sigh, I came around my desk and leaned against it. “Emma, I want to apologize again for this morning. That’s not the type of man I am. I don’t yell at women, or…” I let my words fade.
She looked away, and I knew some of those same words were probably uttered to her before by a man who didn’t mean them at all, a man who had promised to love her no matter the good or bad. So why I expected her to believe anything I had to say was beyond me.
“What I mean to say is, I was upset. I saw the French toast, and how happy Hadley was, and my biggest fear surfaced.”
“Your biggest fear?” she asked as she fidgeted with the hem of her sweater.
“Hadley forgetting about her mother. I’ve tried my best to talk about Lisa often because I know at some point, Hadley might forget her.”
Emma slowly shook her head. “She won’t forget her, Aiden. Not if you keep her memory alive.”
My head dropped and I stared at the floor. “I don’t really know what I’m doing, Emma. I think I’m a good dad, but some days it feels like I’m losing my mind, and I don’t know if the decisions I’m making are the right ones.”
“You seem to be doing a good job, if you ask me.”
Lifting my gaze to hers, I attempted to smile. “You’ve only known me a few days, how can you say that?”
“I see it in your daughter. She’s such an amazing little girl, and she loves you so very much. You’re all she talks about when she’s with me. She worries about you as well.”
“Worries about me?” I asked.
“She told me sometimes at night she knows you sit on her bed, watching her sleep. She asked me if you were sad because you missed her mommy.”
I stared at Emma. Words wouldn’t form in my brain.
Letting out a long breath, she made a pleading gesture before letting her hands fall to her sides. “I don’t know how you’re feeling, Aiden, because I’ve never lost a love like yours, or had to hold my life together because I had a child who needed me to do so.” She looked away and bit into her lower lip, like she was attempting to keep something back, a memory of her own that she wasn’t ready or willing to share. “I can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like for you, and if me being in your home is making you uncomfortable, we should rethink this.”
“No,” I said, pushing off the desk. “No, I don’t want to rethink this. I need time, Emma, that’s all. I swear to you, I won’t let what happened this morning happen again.”
She grimaced. “I overreacted as well, and you didn’t really yell. You raised your voice, and that’s your right if you were concerned about your daughter.”
I shook my head. “You didn’t overreact. I should never have raised my voice to you.”
She swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. I started to speak, but she cut me off.
“I’m not some fragile woman who’s going to get her feelings hurt if you tell me I’m doing something wrong. I need you to know that. I had a moment, just like you had a moment. I think we were both caught off guard by feelings we’re both trying to figure out. I really don’t want to leave, but if you feel like it would be the best thing for Hadley, I definitely will.”
Making my way closer, I stopped in front of her. “No, I don’t want you to leave, and I know Hadley would be upset if you did. She’s adjusted to this so much faster and easier than I have, and I think that’s also thrown me. But having you here the last few days has already made a difference. It truly has.”
The corners of her mouth rose slightly. “I’m glad I’ve been able to lighten your load some, but I have a feeling you don’t like me, or maybe don’t like having me here.”
I wanted to tell her that wasn’t all she’d done, and she was dead wrong about me not liking her. She’d sparked something back to life in both me and Hadley. For the first time in months, I felt something inside, and while I wasn’t sure exactly what that was, it made me happy, and not sad, for once.