Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 148397 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 742(@200wpm)___ 594(@250wpm)___ 495(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 148397 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 742(@200wpm)___ 594(@250wpm)___ 495(@300wpm)
The way she watched me.
Maternally.
Kindly.
It very nearly brought me to my knees.
The weight of the world crushed my shoulders, and all I wanted to do was beg this woman to fix everything. To reverse all my actions. To heal Ily and heal me. To stop me from ever being this way.
Swallowing around the rocks in my throat, I nodded. “Fine.”
Melanie sucked in a breath as if surprised by my sudden amenability.
Stepping closer, Rose dared put her hand on my filthy forearm. “Do you give me your word that you’ll look after her? That you won’t hurt her anymore?”
I wanted to tell her it wasn’t me who hurt her, but I couldn’t.
Every wound she carried was because of me.
“On the memory of my mother, I swear I only want to help.”
“In that case…may I?” Moving her hand from my forearm to Ily’s cheek, she raised an eyebrow. “If you intend on bathing her and treating her bruises, she’ll need something to withstand the pain. Once she’s clean and resting, we’ll come in with the portable X-ray machine and take a few slides of her chest and abdomen to make sure nothing is broken. I’m hoping she’ll stay unconscious while you tend to her, but…if she wakes while you’re still treating her, she might hurt herself by trying to get away. So…I’m willing to trust you, Henri.”
My eyes flew to hers.
Another?
Yet another person willing to trust me when I’d done nothing to deserve it?
What Peter had said crowded my mind.
“I see what she does now. You did come for us. You’re going to free us. I know it—”
I had no intention of doing that.
I had nowhere else to go.
If I stepped foot outside this place, I’d die. And I was a selfish, selfish man because I had no intention of releasing Ily.
“Peter informed us that Ily doesn’t tolerate chemicals well. However, the usual over-the-counter medicines won’t dull her pain enough. So…” She flicked a look at the doctor. “Do you think she could tolerate GHB, Mel?”
Dr Belford’s eyes widened. “The date rape drug? Are you mad? You want to give a highly potent drug to someone who can’t metabolise them?”
“Her system already makes GHB. We all do. Albeit in very tiny amounts. I doubt she’d have an adverse reaction to it as long as we got the dose right.”
“I’d hope to God we got it right because the wrong one would be fatal.”
“Fatal?” I backed up, hugging Ily closer. “No fucking way are you giving her anything that could kill her. Jesus.”
Both the nurse and the doctor looked at me with matching questionable expressions.
I didn’t care we were on camera.
I didn’t care Victor would see his in-house doctor yelling at me or my responses to Ily’s condition. He could taunt me or threaten me all he wanted, but under no circumstances would I put Ily through another experience like the one she’d had in Ruby Tears.
And the fact I could look back on that night—one of the most freeing of my life—and only abhor it now broke yet another fucking part of me.
Were there any pieces left?
How much could a man keep breaking before he shattered into dust?
Rose held up the tiny glass vial. “This is GHB in liquid form. It’s practically tasteless and—”
“No.” I shook my head.
“She’s in a lot of pain, Henri.” Rose used liberties with my name again. “She might’ve fainted because of Peter’s treatment, but I think it’s more about the fact she reached the limits of her endurance. The kindest thing you could do for her is to let her sleep while you tend to her. And this” —she wriggled the bottle— “is probably the only sedative she can have.”
I stepped back again.
Rose followed me. “This doesn’t work the same way as psilocybin. It’s gamma-hydroxybutyrate, and in the dose I’m suggesting, all she’ll feel is tired. If she wakes, her pain receptors will be dulled. The worst side effects would be slight inhibition and giddiness. That’s all.”
“I’m not fucking drugging her, alright?”
Ily moaned in my arms; her eyes cracked open a little.
Rose caught her hazy gaze and smiled. “Welcome back. How’re you feeling?”
“Sore.” Ily winced, trying to get away from my arm pressed against her ribs.
I shifted immediately, swallowing a hiss as her hair stuck to my stab wound.
Melanie darted forward, snatching the vial out of Rose’s hand. “Now you’re awake…you can make the choice.” Smiling thinly, she added, “As you know, Peter’s in a bad way, and we need to tend to him first. But…you’re also in a state. Your Master has agreed to do the initial clean-up and tend to your bruises. It will hurt. You really shouldn’t move. Rose has suggested you take a micro-dose of GHB to keep you still, and…I tend to agree with her.”
Ily stiffened. “No, I can’t—”
“You shouldn’t have any symptoms like you did last time. All you should feel is drowsy and free from pain for a while. Does that sound okay?”