Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 92809 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92809 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
She’s still blaming herself. I see the wounds under her brash exterior, so raw.
“There is a choice,” I say. “You can either take your position back at the Agency and never see me again, or you can resign from your role.”
“Resign from my role and what? Move away?” She scoffs. “Fancy living in a beach hut with me? We can elope together.”
“It’s your choice, Tiff. Creamgirl with the conditions attached, or resignation.”
“And what about you? You just go on with the Agency regardless? Don’t worry, you can always pretend it’s me under the hood, even if they don’t have the ass for it.”
I grit my teeth at that. Her brashness trying to play things down.
“I don’t want Ella under a hood, and I don’t want Harlot under a hood. I don’t want any of the entertainers under a hood, actually. Not anymore. What I do want, is you.” My eyes pierce hers. “If I didn’t, we wouldn’t be in this situation, and you wouldn’t have such a choice to make right now. But the choice won’t be there long, Tiffany. Orla is expecting a yes or a no within the hour.”
Tiff looks confused. “You’ve got conditions too, I guess. You aren’t allowed to see me?”
“Founders aren’t allowed to engage personally with entertainers, no. That’s a fundamental rule.”
“Yeah, so we’re fucked anyway, if you’re not allowed to engage with me. I may as well be Creamgirl.”
“May as well be, or want to be?”
“Does it make any difference?”
My stare doesn’t break. “Yes, it does. Because if either of us stay at the Agency, our encounters will be forbidden. Hence, I’m asking you, do you want to continue being Creamgirl?”
Her eyes narrow.
“Wait a minute. I’ve got to choose between my career and you? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yes, it is.”
She twists on her stool. “And what happens to you? You have to choose between the Agency and me?”
“Indeed.”
She gives another scoff. “Fucking hell, Reuben. That’s a done deal, then. That’s got to be worth fucking millions. MILLIONS. And the associations. And everything along with it. Don’t worry, I’ll stay away and carry on being Creamgirl. You don’t need to feel guilty about it.”
My emotions want to burst out of my chest, and it’s so at odds with the man I’ve been for years. I love power. Self-restraint. The safety of being in control. But this woman in front of me has taken so much of it away from me. She’s stolen my heart and my sanity.
“This has nothing to do with guilt,” I say. “Do you want to carry on being Creamgirl, or do you want to let her go?”
It feels as though we are at a poker table, hedging the bets.
“You’re phrasing that weirdly on purpose,” she says, and locks me with her sparkling eyes. “What you’re really asking is, do I want to be Creamgirl more than I want to be with you. That’s it, isn’t it? That’s what you’re asking?”
Her words give me shivers. The sword over my head feels precarious.
I remember Jeanette leaving. I remember telling myself I would never be so exposed to heartache again. Until the curvy goddess in front of me came into my life.
“What is it you really want?” I ask her. “Not just with Creamgirl, but with life.”
She stiffens up. “Like the future, future? Do I look like a married with kids kind of girl?”
There’s a knife edge in her voice. Defensive.
“You look like you could be. Because that’s what I want, Tiff. I want to close the door on the past and live for my own self for once. Not out of power or success or charity, but because of me. I want to be married again, to a married with kids kind of woman.” I take a breath before the admission. “And I want that woman to be you.”
She raises her eyebrows. Gobsmacked.
“Are you for real?!”
“I’ve never been more for real in my life.”
“You’re serious? You want me to be a married with kids kind of girl, with you?”
“That is exactly what I’m saying, yes. I’ve been very careful with risk taking until you burst into the grotto, but since then, things have changed. I’ve changed. Remember those fated words? I need you?” My insides swirl. “I wasn’t lying, Tiff.”
“Whoa, fuck. Just whoa.”
She looks like she’s about to fall off her chair, as though the idea is absurd.
“But I also appreciate how much passion you have for Creamgirl and the Agency. I understand how passionate you are about your career, and I’ll respect that.”
My goddess blows out a breath and it’s as if a huge weight has been lifted, not just from her shoulders, but mine, too. I feel it as she smiles at me.
“It’s not much of a question then, is it?” She reaches for my phone on the countertop and shoves it towards me. “Bye bye, Creamgirl, I had fun while it lasted.”