Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 49645 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 199(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 49645 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 199(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
I cried out as I came. I dug my fingers into Rush’s body as wave after wave of pleasure washed over me. The tears I’d been keeping at bay for months began to slip down my cheeks. Unfortunately, so did the emotions I’d been holding prisoner deep inside of me for just as long. As the natural high began to wind down, the despair, the loneliness, the stark terror of the unknown all came crashing down on me, and the silent tears turned to ugly sobs.
I tried to pull free of Rush’s hold so I could escape in shame, but he refused to release me. At some point he’d moved one of his hands up to my back and the other to the back of my head. I was trapped whether I liked it or not. And deep down in the emptiness of my soul, I did like it. I couldn’t deny it.
But I also couldn’t let it happen. It would become this ugly, aching thing when it was taken away from me.
And it would be taken away.
Despite my struggles, Rush just hugged me tighter. But it was his words that ultimately did me in, that took the fight right out of me.
“Let go, Christopher. You’re safe, sweetheart.”
So that was exactly what I did.
It was ugly and uncontrollable, and while I tried more than once to get ahold of myself, the tears kept coming, the cries of rage and anguish didn’t let up, and I clung to Rush like he was my lifeline.
Which he very much was, even if that hadn’t been his intention.
I couldn’t say how long my meltdown lasted, but by the time I was able to make sense of the present, I was wrung out. The powerful orgasm was nothing more than a memory now. I’d been shown the heights of pleasure for the first time and by a man I could only classify as perfect, and I’d turned it into my own personal pity party.
My mind began to race with what to say to Rush, or at least how to extricate my body from his, when a sharp sound suddenly pierced the silence.
Mission very much accomplished.
I jerked backward enough to put some space between me and Rush, but his hand at my back prevented me from escaping entirely.
“It’s the secondary alarm on my phone,” he said gently. “I was afraid I’d keep hitting snooze on the first one if I fell asleep, so I set a second one.”
I barely managed to process his words because I was too busy memorizing every detail of his face. His hair was sticking up in several spots, probably thanks to my roaming fingers. His eyes were that nearly black color again, but his expression was soft and relaxed. His gorgeous lips looked as gently bruised as mine felt, proof of how perfectly and often our mouths had melded.
“You need to take your medicine.”
Rush’s words tore me from the haze I’d been in. “What?” I asked in surprise.
“That’s why I set the alarm. Dr. Kleinman told me to make sure you take your medicines at the right times.”
Right.
Because I was sick.
Used.
Dirty.
Pain slashed through me as the pieces clicked into place. He’d driven me to Dr. Kleinman’s office because of my hand, and he’d stayed the night because they’d given me something for the pain. Dr. Kleinman had made him feel obligated to stay.
So all that talk about how beautiful I was while I slept…
I shook my head in disbelief as I realized I’d repeated the same mistakes that had left me in the position I was in.
They’d just been pretty words, probably spoken out of pity, especially after I’d instigated the whole thing by kissing his finger.
As my mind began to replay the events of the last twenty-four hours at a rapid rate, his words from the day before hit me like a ton of bricks. He’d said them just before I’d fallen asleep in the car. I’d asked him if he’d ever found love. Despite being half-asleep, I still remembered how the words had cut through me.
Not yet. But I think all of that is about to change.
He was with someone. Someone important. Someone he was falling in love with. How had I forgotten that?
“Christopher?”
Rush’s confusion was clear. Probably because I was still practically sitting on his lap.
“Sorry,” I muttered and made a move to climb off him, but his hands closed around my hips. Startled, I lifted my eyes to meet his.
“What just happened?” Rush asked.
“Nothing,” I murmured. “You’re right, it’s time to take my medicine.”
I made another move to extricate myself from his hold, but he wouldn’t release me. His eyes had gone from soft to hard just like that, and like when I’d first met him, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
It was unnerving as hell.
Especially since he wasn’t letting me go so we could just pretend the whole thing hadn’t happened.