Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 84075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 420(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 420(@200wpm)___ 336(@250wpm)___ 280(@300wpm)
“Complicated how?”
“You’ll have to marry me to hear that story.” He looks at me and he’s smiling again. “I hoped this would make you a little more comfortable. Are you too cold?”
“No, I’m okay,” I say and it’s true. The Texas night is humid, but there’s lots of lighting around, a dull glow coming around the club walls and the built-in fixtures set discreetly around the paths.
“Let me ask you something and be honest. What made you change your mind?”
I tug at my hair nervously. “It’s complicated.”
“Everything’s complicated. If we’re going to do this, let’s try to do it for real.”
I clear my throat and open my mouth, but how can I make him understand? I’ve been an outsider in my own family for my entire life and treated like scum by practically everyone around me, especially my cousins, and especially by Sara Lynn. I don’t look exactly like everyone else which means I’m somehow different from them. And different is very bad in the Stockton world.
“How much do you know… about me?” I ask feeling all sorts of awkward. “I mean, about my parents.”
“Your father isn’t around and your mother is an addict.”
The way he says it makes me sit up straighter. “You don’t think that’s—I don’t know, bad?”
“I’m not sure how it’s your fault that your father didn’t stick around, and you definitely didn’t get your mother addicted to drugs.”
“My mom’s been in and out of rehabs for years at this point. Everyone pretty much knows about it, and Grandfather’s getting sick of supporting her. He thinks she’s embarrassing and worthless, and I’m afraid—” I stop myself and take a breath. “They look down on me already, and I guess I figure it can’t get any worse.”
He accepts that wordlessly. His head tilts to the side as he considers me and I try to stare at the flowers instead of at him, but every time I look over, I feel a leap in my stomach and throat. This man can’t seriously have any interest in me, and if he does, it’s only because he wants to use me for his own purposes. He said it himself—at a certain point we’re all playing games.
And that’s okay. I don’t need to like him and he doesn’t need to like me.
So long as he can help.
“You want to hurt them,” he says finally. “Is that it? You want to marry me out of revenge?”
“Something like that. I’ll admit, the look on Sara Lynn’s face when she finds out is going to be worth it.” I tap my glass and look at him. “But the biggest question is why do you want to marry me?”
“I told you before, my grandfather wants me to get married. If I’m going to take over my family, I need a wife, and you’re very conveniently looking for a husband. And like you, I also want to hurt my family for my own reasons.”
“I find it hard to believe that you don’t have a perfect life.”
He laughs at that like I’m kidding, but I’m not. Ford has everything I’ve always wanted—he fits in with this world, while I’m stuck standing on the margins staring in through dirty windows and trying to figure out a way to survive in a house filled with people that either dislike me or would prefer it if I simply disappeared.
“Things are complicated,” he says and doesn’t look like he’s going to elaborate.
“We can help each other then.” I clear my throat and sit up straighter. I look him in the eye—this is what I’m really here for. “Grandfather is going to cut me off the second you and I get engaged. But I think he’s going to cut me off sooner or later anyway, including my mom.”
“You want to marry me for my money? You make me feel so dirty and used, Kat.”
I grin at him. “In a way, yeah, except it’s not for me. I want you to swear you’ll take care of my mother no matter what happens.”
He lets that sink in for a moment. It hangs between us, and I’m not sure he fully understands what it means.
Mom isn’t easy. When she’s clean and sober, it’s okay, but she’s almost never clean, and if he agrees to step in when my grandfather inevitably throws a hissy fit over this engagement, he’s going to be dealing with my mother’s bullshit for the rest of his life. It’s no small task, but I love my mother, and I’m not stupid enough to ask for anything less than his full devotion if I’m going to give myself over to him.
“I take it that means paying for rehab,” he says.
“And bailing her out of prison, keeping her name out of the news, paying her dealers when they inevitably come looking for her, and a whole host of other problems. If I could wave a magic wand and make my mother sober, you better believe I’d do it. I’d give a limb to make that happen. But at this point, I think she’s going to die high, and I’m still not going to turn my back on her.”