Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 92368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 369(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 369(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
And she adores him, too.
Gigi still doesn’t know that Zeus is her father. But I know we’re getting close to that time.
Zeus hasn’t once pushed the issue with me or asked when we’re going to tell her the truth.
I guess I’m delaying it because I’m scared of her reaction. But also because it would make it real.
I need to be braver and tell her.
I’m thinking this weekend will be the best time. After her morning ballet class. Zeus has asked to take her. So, we can sit down together after that and tell her.
Zeus is here. He’s in the living room with Gigi, playing Guess Who?—the My Little Pony version. He brought it with him for her.
It’s the only other gift he’s bought her since he got her Princess Twilight Sparkle that first day, so I don’t mind too much. She takes that toy everywhere with her. I think it’s partly because she always wanted one. But more so because Zeus bought it for her.
I’m in the kitchen, making dinner. We’re having mac and cheese. Nothing too fancy. Zeus is staying for food, like he has every night. No Aunt Elle tonight, as she’s at the station. She’s not been home a lot lately. She’s got some big case going on.
But she said she would watch Gigi tomorrow night for me, so I can go out for a drink with Rich.
I guess I could’ve asked Zeus to watch her for me, but it would’ve felt weird, asking him to babysit her while I was out with Rich. Even though Rich is just a friend. I know Zeus has a problem with him. So, it’s not worth the hassle.
It’s hard, being around Zeus so much. Our relationship is strained, but we’re cordial to each other. It’s almost like we dance around each other. We exchange pleasantries. Yeses and noes. Pleases and thank-yous. But not a real conversation.
If I’m being truthful, I still harbor a hell of a lot of anger and resentment for how he ended our relationship. But I have to bury that, for Gigi’s sake. I have to pretend. That I never loved him. That he never broke my heart.
It’s hard.
I still want answers from him that I never got.
The main questions being, Why did he do it? Why did he cheat on me?
If he had fallen out of love with me, then why not end things with me before dipping his dick in someone else?
I mean, I would have been heartbroken if he’d ended things with me because he didn’t love me anymore. But to know that he had sex with another woman…it destroyed me.
And I’ve never really come to terms with those feelings. Because, a few months later, I found out that I was pregnant with Gigi and was made to believe that he wanted nothing to do with her, so my anger for him turned to hate. I hated him for abandoning his child.
Now that I know that was never the case, my anger and resentment have swung back to what he did to me.
And, honestly, it’s been feeling harder and harder to ignore it and pretend like I don’t feel that way when I’m around him.
I pour the mac and cheese into a serving dish and grab the serving spoon. I carry them through to the dining room.
“Dinner’s ready,” I call as I pass through the hallway.
I put the mac and cheese down on the table, which I set with plates, silverware, a jug of water, and glasses before I started dinner. I head back to the kitchen to get the salad and garlic bread I prepared.
When I bring them to the table, Gigi and Zeus are already seated next to each other, waiting for me.
“I poured you a glass of water,” Zeus tells me.
“Thanks,” I say.
I put the salad and garlic bread on the table and take a seat across from them.
Zeus dishes up mac and cheese onto Gigi’s plate for her. Then, he holds out a hand for mine. I pass my plate over and let him serve me. He hands me back my plate, and I put some salad on, too.
Zeus piles mac and cheese on his plate. I’ve had to double up on the food I usually make, as he has a huge appetite. He always has. But then he is a big guy, and he trains a lot.
We eat dinner, making small talk. Mainly, Gigi tells us about her day at pre-K. Zeus asks me about my day at work, so I tell him. And then I ask about his day.
It’s all very domestic. Too familiar.
I know it’s because he’s been spending every night eating with us. But I don’t want Gigi getting too used to it, as it won’t always be like this. Zeus won’t always be here, in Port Washington, to eat dinner with her every night.