Series: Fever Falls Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 96260 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96260 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
“Since we’re being honest, Lucas, I think I should make my own confession. You see, I didn’t really care for him, not like I do now. I was acting out, partly at least, because I thought it was the right thing to do. I think I’ve discovered through all this that I’ve had bisexual impulses I haven’t addressed for far too long. I’ve been thinking a lot about that, more and more these days. I really believe I chose to go out with women because in some way, deep down, I’d denied that other side of myself because I was afraid of what it would do to me socially. I wasn’t ever intending to…”
I quieted.
“Fall in love?” he asked. “It’s okay to admit it, Owen.”
Love.
God, was that what it really was? And yet, as I gazed down at him, laughing his head off as he chatted with Jace and Dax, I knew my brother was right.
“Snuck up on me, I guess,” I confessed.
Lucas reached out and set his hand on my arm. “I’m sorry, Owen. I should have been here for you. I should have seen past my own pride and pain…not just about this, but about so many things.”
Despite how he’d withheld his support before, in a moment, having it meant everything. Because it wasn’t just coming from the King—it was coming from my brother, who until that moment, I hadn’t realized I hadn’t truly seen in so very long.
“I should have done the same for you, brother,” I assured him, moving toward him.
It had been so long since we’d shared a hug, but he didn’t resist me as I hooked my arms around him, pulling him close to me.
I didn’t fight the tears racing down my cheeks.
We held one another for a moment before pulling back. He sniffled as he wiped the tears from his eyes.
“I’ve missed you,” I told him. “Missed you for a long time.”
“I’ve missed you too, Owen. It’s nice to have my brother back.”
“It’s been hard feeling like I couldn’t come to you. We used to tell each other everything. Be so honest in a world where we had to hide so much.”
“Then while we’re being open, I suppose it would be a good time for me to offer you a word of caution.”
His words caught me off guard.
“I have no objections to Keegan, and I would like to think you can tell by my presence here and after everything I shared tonight that I don’t have any concern about what your union would mean for our family, so please take my caution as the well-meaning gesture it’s intended to be. The boy, look at him, so young and full of life.”
I turned to Keegan, who continued mingling, his eyes alight with such enthusiasm.
“Remember what Mother told us? ‘To be a royal, is—’”
“‘To sacrifice,’” I offered, parroting her philosophy.
“You’ve seen it in your own life. The average person gets to live for themselves, enjoy the world in all its splendor without being weighed down by duty and obligation. They fuck up for themselves. When they fall, they curl away in private and cry. No saving face. But the life of a royal is a life of service, much like being a member of the cloth. You saw in your youth that even our mourning is a trial when we carry with us the obligations of country and duty.”
I sure knew the truth of it.
“It’s a heavy burden to carry, but it is ours by birthright. Even our most normal day isn’t so normal. So please, as you consider Keegan’s feelings, don’t forget what you’re asking him to sacrifice, and remember that he can’t really understand it…until perhaps it’s too late. As Mother always said, ‘Real truth isn’t discovered by thinking about today, but—’”
“‘By thinking about tomorrow.’”
“You and I both know the price that comes with being a part of this family. I was lucky to meet Marilyn, who already had some of this from being a duchess. However, even she couldn’t have fully understood until after we were married. She lives under constant scrutiny. Her every interest, every gesture is being heavily critiqued by her public. The watchful eye of the people does not cease when you need privacy or a moment…or leave you any less burdened when you have a secret you must keep.”
He was obviously referring to the one we held for Mother and Mère.
“Being a royal requires the ability to be strong even in the hardest of times. Keegan has managed by keeping his life in the sanctuary of this place so far away from our world. But is Keegan ready for a life like that? Can he handle this weight we carry with us? And years from now, if he chooses to, will he come to resent you for not warning him about all it entailed? Even though it was something you could have never really explained to him, something he could only see for himself? Is this something you can bear to watch him sign up for, knowing all this?”